British Comedy Guide

What are you watching on TV? Page 2,139

Quote: Rood Eye @ 16th December 2018, 9:09 PM

I should be watching "The Apprentice" final but instead, I'm watching "British Sports Personality of the Year" because it's overrunning.

They've announced the winner (of whom I have never heard) and we are now being played out by somebody called George Ezra (who is allegedly one of Britain's top musical artists but of whom I have also never heard).

George Ezra is good though. Did you see him on Vic and Bob's?

Quote: Chappers @ 17th December 2018, 3:22 PM

George Ezra is good though. Did you see him on Vic and Bob's?

As I write these words, I'm watching him on a recording of Vic and Bob.

I'd never seen or heard of him before in my life prior to his appearance on "Sports Personality of the Year" and, although he seems like a nice guy with a nice singing voice, I'd rate him alongside Ollie Murs: absolutely nothing wrong with him but instantly forgettable.

When I think of stars in the world of British solo singing artists, I think of people like Rod Stewart, Tom Jones, Alison Moyet, Tony Christie, Elton John, Kate Bush and David Bowie.

With great respect to all the young British singing stars of today, I have to say I don't think they're making them like they used to.

Oh I wouldn't bracket him with Olly Murrs who sounds like dozens of other current singers. But Ezra has such an original distinctive voice.

I wouldn't lump him in with the classics though.

Give him chance, they all have about 70+ years on him.

I had been watching test cricket match between Australia and India since 4 days now.

Quote: johnsonraider @ 18th December 2018, 5:28 PM

I had been watching test cricket match between Australia and India since 4 days now.

Cricket is worse than Trump.

Index finger up for chappers.

Quote: Stephen Goodlad @ 19th December 2018, 7:23 AM

Index finger up for chappers.

I've no idea what that means although I've never had a prostate examination.

I think its raising your hand in agreement like at school. I also agree because cricket has to be the most boring sport there is.

I have never watched cricket on TV and I can honestly say that, in my entire life, I have only ever met one person who expressed an interest in cricket.

Interestingly, however, he assured me that if everybody were made to learn the rules of cricket, everybody would love it.

Quote: Rood Eye @ 19th December 2018, 4:50 PM

I have never watched cricket on TV and I can honestly say that, in my entire life, I have only ever met one person who expressed an interest in cricket.

Interestingly, however, he assured me that if everybody were made to learn the rules of cricket, everybody would love it.

I haven't got the time!

Quote: Chappers @ 19th December 2018, 4:25 PM

I've no idea what that means although I've never had a prostate examination.

Lucky you. I had two such examinations only last week :O

From the umpire - it means you're out.

Anyway, a quick look at the rules will explain it all.

You have two sides, one out in the field and one in. Each man that's in the side that's in goes out, and when he's out he comes in and the next man goes in until he's out.
When they are all out, the side that's out comes in and the side that's been in goes out and tries to get those coming in, out.

Sometimes you get men still in and not out.

When a man goes out to go in, the men who are out try to get him out, and when he is out he goes in and the next man in goes out and goes in.
There are two men called umpires who stay out all the time and they decide when the men who are in are out. When both sides have been in and all the men have been out, and both sides have been out twice after all the men have been in, including those who are not out, that is the end of the game

Quote: Stephen Goodlad @ 19th December 2018, 7:41 PM

From the umpire - it means you're out.

Anyway, a quick look at the rules will explain it all.

You have two sides, one out in the field and one in. Each man that's in the side that's in goes out, and when he's out he comes in and the next man goes in until he's out.
When they are all out, the side that's out comes in and the side that's been in goes out and tries to get those coming in, out.

Sometimes you get men still in and not out.

When a man goes out to go in, the men who are out try to get him out, and when he is out he goes in and the next man in goes out and goes in.
There are two men called umpires who stay out all the time and they decide when the men who are in are out. When both sides have been in and all the men have been out, and both sides have been out twice after all the men have been in, including those who are not out, that is the end of the game

:D Sounds like the Two Ronnies.

The news

Jeremy Corbyn is a big liar

He quite clearly called Teresa May a "stupid heartless c**t"

Resign!

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