Twitter police

been playing around with this sketch, but not sure if I like it or not, think it needs more, or scrapping altogether:

External - Day - Policeman knocking on a door

Man opens door

Man:
Hello how can I help you

Policeman looks at a notepad he is holding

Policeman:
Are you Craig Jones

Man:
Yes that's me mate, how can I help you

Policeman:
Is your twitter username craigyboyjones

Man:
Yes that's right, what's this all about?

Policeman:
On the 14th November at 12:45 PM did you tweet the following words "My mother in law is so fat, when she calls over my house we lose the wireless signal"

Man:
Yeah that's right, she is massive

Policeman:
Well she took offence to your tweet and so did her two sisters and consequently they have filed a complaint against you, so you need to come with me to the police station.

Man:
What, so your arresting me for offending my mother in law on twitter

Policeman:
Yes sir I am afraid so

Man:
Well she is guna go nuts, when she finds the little present I left in her bath

Fade out

END

Not bad but I'd make the punchline how does she know she can't get Wi-Fi because she's so fat

Thanks sooty once again, - But how do you mean where would I put that line at the end?

I think the mother in law joke bit needs changing/improving.

I mean instead of the shit in the bath punchline which felt a little obvious the joke being he isn't being rude she's genuinely fat enough to block Wi-Fi

Ahh right I see, yes I like that angle he was telling the truth, even better.

Thought I'd say Carlos nice to see you've fitted in youre part of the furniture these days

Thought I'd say Carlos nice to see you've fitted in youre part of the furniture these days

Hey thanks Sooty, I like it here it has helped me a lot with writing and knowing what is good and what is crap, and as forums goes for comedy stuff it is very active here.