THE DR IS TALKING TO THE BRIGADIER IN HIS OFFICE
DR
It was a close one with those cyber men and they're plan to hide cybermats in Ginsters cornish pasties. Lucky I...
BRIGADIER
Yes, yesthat's not what I wanted to talk you about Dr.
DR
It's not those devilish sea devils?
BRIGADIER
It's your immigration status. I mean do you even have a passport?
DR
No I'm a travelling, time lord, I...
BRIGADIER
Look shut up. We need you to do us a favor, we're picking your next companion.
DR
No way UNIT aren't using my TARDIS to sneak commandoes back in time to change history.
BRIGADIER
Oh shut up. It's much more important than killing Hitler. You're new companion is....
JIMMY SAVILLE BURSTS IN THROUGH THE OFFICE DOOR.
JIMMY SAVILLE
Now then, now then neeuurrrggggh!
DR
But, but why? He's a marathon running monster paedo nonce!
JIMMY SAVILLE
So I can back in time and sexually abuse all those famous birds who are too old to make my dinkle tinkle, now then, now then! I'm going to be rippin Angela Ripponz school uniform!
DR
But you can't use the epogee of Gallifreyan temporal technology to nonce up proto celebrities. It'll f**k up the space time continuim no end and its disgusting.
BRIGADIER
If we don't, Sir Jimmy Saville won't do a fun run for Stoke Mandeville.
JIMMY SAVILLE
It could cost them a million pounds neuuuurrrrggghh! I'm going to collapse Delia Smith's prepubesent souffle now then now then.
DR
Fine if it's for charity I'll do it. Now where's K9? Jimmy!
WE CAN SEE THE SEX CRAZED SIR JIMMY IS DRY HUMPING K9
K9
Master is this the emotion you humans call love? I like it!
JIMMY SAVILLE
Now then! Now then!
