About me:
After leaving school, I went abroad and became a professional footballer and had a subsequent illustrious playing career with Real Madrid, Barcelona, Santos, Boca Juniors, Estudiantes, Bayern Munich, AC Milan, Lazio, Marseilles, Crystal Palace, (the very pinnacle of my career) and England, scoring a hat-trick in the famous World Cup victory of 1986, when we beat Argentina 5-0 in that unforgettable final, but a subsequent injury to my hair forced early retirement. I then subsequently became a professional guitarist and rock god, playing in the Sex Pistols, the Pretenders, the Police, U2 and subsequently ending up with the Rolling Stones, which is my current job. During this, I converted to Islam and subsequently married three wives, but when they wouldn't let me marry a fourth, I left Islam and subsequently became a Mormon. I now have 23 wives, 81 children and 666 grandchildren. The arguments are terrible, but the Child Tax Credit is amazing! As I was just saying to Mick and Keef the other day, if only they'd
