British Comedy Guide

The mysterious disappearance of George

My aunt had contacted me yesterday and asked me for a ride to her work today, her car was for repair and she where going in the same direction as me. I said I would pick her up this morning.

In the car we talked about different family matters and then the conversation topic came across my grandfather's brother George, who went missing recently.

George is 82 year old man from Canada. He moved to Canada when he was a young man, where he established his own sawmill and started a family. He had come to Denmark for a week to visit my grandfather who recently had experienced two blood clots in the brain.

When I visited my father last week, he told me that George was disappeared and nobody knew anything.

-By the way has there been any new development about George's missing?

-Jennifer has sent me a very angry mail

-Who is Jennifer?

-She is George's daughter, she is 60 years old

-What did she write?

-She wrote we were some reckless irresponsible people, who should have a really bad taste in our mouths. How could we fail so miserly in helping her old father? She was completely speechless and demanded an unreserved apology from me and your father.

-Uh-what?

-That was what she wrote

-But my father was there! He stood there 30 minutes before George was scheduled to arrive. There was no George on the train. Then my father searched the entire area around the train station, he waited on next train, he searched on the next train station. There was no George anywhere!

-Jennifer doesn't know that

-But didn't you call George's family and asked if we should call him missing by the police

-We only talked to George's son Frank, and Frank didn't want us to tell Jennifer or George's wife Lily-Marie about his disappearing. There was no need to make them worry. Wouldn't change a thing about the situation

-uh ok?

-Frank said we should give it some days. George had made this kind of mysterious disappearing before

-Yesterday his flight for Canada was scheduled. Did he come back to Canada?

-Yes he is back in Canada again

-Did he tell his family where he had been?

-Frank asked him in private what happened in Denmark, and he replied that there was nobody to meet him at the train station and he had been so unlucky to lose the phone numbers to everyone he knew in Denmark. So he had to sleep 6 days at the train station

-It's not possible to sleep on Roskilde train station at nights. There are guards who throw people out at night

-Frank was also not convinced by George's story. So he asked him if he had been on one of his ladies trips

-What did George answer to that?

-He had said (American with a thick Danish farmer accent): NJOOOV NJOV NJOV NJOV

-What are you going to tell Jennifer now?

-We're going to tell her that we are very sorry that George had to sleep on the train station for 6 days

I'm guessing that this is a true story.

It doesn't strike me as funny unless I'm missing something in the 'NJOV' line due to not knowing Danish.

Even if I am missing something, and that line is hilarious if I got it, I think this needs serious tightening up. You could probably cut it to well under a third of it's size.

yeah its a true story.

thank you for your critique :)

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