Quote: Nigel Kelly @ September 4 2012, 10:49 PM BSTHaemorrhoid Hurdles
Siamese Twin Rodeo
Mobility Scooter Fencing
That's the idea. 
Paralympic events we want to see Page 2
The triathlon for people who really just can't be arsed.
Drunk Showjump Javelin - not sure of the rules, but man, beast or spectator, some f**ker's gonna die
Quote: Nigel Kelly @ September 4 2012, 10:49 PM BSTTramps running around a greyhound track chasing a bottle of cheap wine attached to the hare. You could use a velodrome if you were stuck.
A la Father Ted?
The Irish, what are we to do with them?
Oh . . . . .
Pistol shooting for paranoid schizophrenics (a real edge of your seat spectator event)
Quote: Kevin Murphy @ September 4 2012, 10:04 PM BSTAttention Deficit Disorder Marathon.
Ha ha ha ha.
Do they have a Winter Paralympics?
Wheelchair Slalom.
Acrophobia ski jump.
No because they'd be worried Petter Northtug would chop his leg off to win gold twice for cross country skiing.
Man Flu Judo
Wanker's Cramp Pole Vault
Functional Alcoholic Table Tennis
Don't get it.
You could say the same of the Olympics for most of those.