British Comedy Guide

Young Morse

Voice-over: And now on ITV3, back to the concluding part of Young Morse

Int Police Station Cell-block. Decor and cut of uniforms gives off a late 70s feel. MORSE is in a Seargents Uniform, LEWIS is in a PC's uniform

LEWIS: (in Newcastle accent) So, Seargent Morse, divent ye nar n allreet n all that pet, like. So, Lady Caroline is dead. Sir Charles is in a coma. Baronness Aldershot has an alibi and even Sir Nigel, the self-made millionaire industrialist with a chip on his shoulder, is in the clear. I just don't understand it, like. It looks like someone is going to get away with murder. Ya canna believe it man. This is the seventies, like!

MORSE: The seventies? (Beat) My God, Lewis, I've been so stupid!

Cut to: A police Mini Metro gunning down the street. A squeal of tires and it skids to a halt.

Cut to: Int Police Interview room. A wide eyed, scared looking black man with bruises on his face is in the background as MORSE and INSPECTOR are talking as they leave the room and enter the corridor, Camera follows them.

INSPECTOR: So Morse, you're telling me this Jamaican man who, judging by the ticket stubs in his pocket, was in London at the time of the murder, is in fact the murderer.

MORSE: He confessed sir!

INSPECTOR: Oh right, let's all go and get pissed then.

INSPECTOR walks back in to interview room.

INSPECTOR: (from off screen)I say, MORSE, this man has broken fingers and he appears to have(beat) shat himself.

MORSE: (looking sheepish) Yes, sir.

INSPECTOR walks back into corridor

INSPECTOR: I say, bloody good policing. You'll go far MORSE, you'll go far. Just, one thing puzzles me. Why a jamaican?

LEWIS: Cos we couldn't find an Irishman.

ALL three laugh heartily.

End.

I love the initial premise.
I'd have liked to have seen that pushed a bit more

How do you mean?

This sketch has been in my head for literally years but never had the right words before so is still a bit muddled

I thought it was Morse morphing into a kind of Jack Regan
Because it was back in the Seventies.

And I liked that idea.

Yeah.
Needs more Morse references.
How would those 'Morse' traits work/be a problem/change in the 70's.
Real ale versus Watney's Red Barrel etc etc.

I just don't think you've explored those elements enough.

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