No...that's terrible! I want a refund!
Sketch Comp 4 - 11.8.12. Page 2
A MAN IS HAVING AN INTERVIEW TO BECOME AN ARCH VILLAIN
INT:
Hello Sir,Come in, sit down. So your applying for the role of Arch Villain?
VILLAIN:
That's right yes. Here I've filled in all the forms.
INT:
Filled in the forms eh? Excellent! You'd be surprised how many of the applicants just fill the room with purple smoke & steal the certificate.
VILLAIN:
Surely that's cheating?
INT:
Well they are Villains I suppose, they often like to hit the ground running as it were. Right now, first things first you'll need a costume, it can be ostentatious or just tight fitting, the choice is yours.
VILLAIN:
Well actually this is my costume.
INT:
It's a bit bland isn't it? You need something that makes you stand out.
VILLAIN:
Why would I want to stand out?
INT:
Sounds like someone just wants to be an ordinary Villain.
VILLAIN:
No No I definitely want to be an Arch Villain. I just don't want to be too conspicuous, I don't want to get foiled by any Superheroes if I can help it.
INT:
Yes but you must understand that as an Arch villain you will be required to be
foiled from time to time.
VILLAIN:
Can I at least try my best not to?
INT:
Yes of course, so what's your Quirk going to be.
VILLAIN:
Quirk?
INT:
Yes you know, your style, your thing, what sort of traps do you set what kind of Clues do you leave?
VILLAIN:
If I leave Clues then I will be more likely to be foiled and as I've already said that's not really part of my masterplan.
INT:
Oh you've got a masterplan well that's something at least.
VILLAIN:
Well It's not really a plan, I just want to work on a bit of General Villainy and if it goes well then I'll probably be looking at Global domination opportunities over the next two or three years.
.
INT:
So if your application is successful what would you be calling yourself?
VILLAIN:
Well my name's Barry
INT:
Yes! by day you are Barry, but by night you are...
VILLAIN:
Still Barry, just a bit sleepier
INT:
No you need a proper name like The Riddler or the Joker.
VILLAIN:
Ok How about I call myself that guy who never gets caught by wearing bright clothing leaving clues or trying to set traps for flipping Superheroes.
INT:
That'll never fit on an outfit even if we abbreviate and you know it!
VILLAIN:
To be honest I didn't think it would be as difficult this.
INT:
I'm sorry but we can't just accept anyone, being an Arch Villain takes years of planning, malice & occasional campness.
VILLAIN:
Would it be ok if I just did the purple smoke thing?
INT:
If you wouldn't mind, it does save on the Paperwork.
Good field, with a strong late entry from the Sunshine boy, but KC82 edges it.
Hard to choose from such a good bunch this week but Ishy's flying shit shield inched it for me 
I didn't think you could have more than one BUT I'm voting for the Monk's second entry - to cheer him up after his op-tickles. Other than that I'd have gone for Ishy's Shit Shield, too.
Ishy
Mr. Sunshine nicks it for me.
Ishy
Gappy for moi
Yes...Ishy for me too.
I liked Gappy's. That was my favourite 
Several good set-up ideas, but Ishy just nicks it for me.
Mr Sunshine, by a midge's whisker.
Very impressive field this time. Lazzard and Overlay both turned in nice tight sketches, but I found the punchlines a little too pat, akthough they were definitely neat.
Lippy made me laugh, but I'd feel a bit insular voting for something so self-referential. Stevie Sunshine nearly takes it, but for me it has to be Tursiops, it's a neat idea, has a lot of sweet little lines and a proper old-fashioned punchline. Good stuff.
A little fuelish, but I'm going with Gappy!