Quote: Shandonbelle @ August 8 2012, 8:45 PM BST1 - Should be worded differently as the long line doesn't seem neat enough to be believable as a book title.
2 - Great as is and my favourite.
3 - Great as is.
4 - I like it but think this would benefit from being shortened to simply show the woman whispering in his ear, then fade up to reveal him standing outside the tradesmen's entrance with her scolding him.
Thanks Shandonbelle. Did you like any of my rewording attempts for 1.?