A topical sketch after reading today's papers.
INT. MADONNA’S AND GUY’S HOUSE. DAY.
GUY ARRIVES HOME AFTER A DAY AT WORK.
GUY: Hi honey I’m home.
F/X SOUND OF GRUNTS AND GROANS COMING FROM UPSTAIRS AND LIKE A VIRGIN PLAYING IN THE BACKGROUND.
GUY: Hello? Madge?
GUY BEGINS TO WALK UPSTAIRS.
F/X MORE SOUNDS OF GRUNTS AND GROANS COMING FROM BEDROOM.
GUY: Have you got another man in there?
HE BURSTS INTO THE BEDROOM. MADONNA IS RIDING AN EXERCISE BIKE. THERE IS EXERCISE EQUIPMENT EVERYWHERE.
MADONNA: Oh hi darling. I didn’t hear you come in.
GUY: What’s all this stuff?
MADONNA: It’s for the marriage inspector.
GUY: I don’t understand.
MADONNA: A marriage inspector is coming to see if we are fit enough to be parents and at my age you can’t be too careful. I’ve got everything covered. Especially my legs. Oh and by the way, I organised a boxing match for you tonight.
GUY: What? Who with?
MADONNA: The mayor of Lichfield. He’ll be around at about 8 o’clock.
