Just to break up the sea of NJ rejections, plus my own boredom!
Dear Sir or Madam,
I am writing a letter of complaint. By the time you will be reading this, I would have wrote it already. The incident in question to which I am writing and would have already wrote about took place four nights ago, which to you when reading shall be approximately seven nights ago, as I don't plan on posting this till Tuesday. Plus, I have overestimated in case you have your Wednesdays off or you may be attending a meeting out of the office, possibly you have a social club to which you attend or it could be your secretary is off sick and you don't receive your mail as scheduled? If that is the case, than I wish your secretary a speedy recovery.
The incident which happened but four nights ago (to you seven) left me very traumatised indeed. I have only just built up the strength to compose this letter and I hope to be back to full strength by the time you would have read it. In which case please disregard this message.
Joan is doing very well. She finally has her appetite back, although this has resulted in rather loose bowels. Not to worry though as those diapers you recommended appear to be doing the job with minimum spillage. Anyway, I shall cut this letter to you short as I am also in the process of making a formal complaint, to which my full attention is needed.
Yours sincerely,
Valerie.
P.S. I shall be posting this letter on Tuesday. I estimate you shall receive it on Thursday as I know you go to your allotment on Wednesday. In which case my condolences at the loss of our friend Joan. If this is not the case, please disregard this post script.
