Honest Views on Sketch Please

THE MARATHON RUNNERS

Short Sketch centred around the start of the London Marathon. You see ariel view of all the fun runners waiting to begin.
Numerous different costumes. i.e. Man dressed as a Burger, man dressed as a clown etc etc.

In amongst all of these are two guys dressed up as Big Ben. The tension is building. The excitement of the moment is caught on the TV cameras.

Commentator to race: “This to my mind is where the real race starts. Men and women who have been training since last year’s Marathon to compete today. Over £50 million will be raised this year in one of the greatest tests of endurance known to man. Look at them. Every one a hero. All of them pushing themselves to their physical and mental limit to raise money for their particular charity. If ever there was an argument that mankind isn’t up to the fight I ask them to look here today”

As soon as the race starts you see all the fun runners gradually walking through the starting posts. Camera zooms in on two men dressed up as Big Ben. Your hear two voices from inside the costume.

Man 1: “Christ Charlie it’s hot, I’m knackered already?”

Man 2: “I said you shouldn’t have gone on the lash last night. Have you done any training for this?”

Man 1: “None whatsoever. How far we gotta go ?”.

Man 2: “It’s over 26 miles mate”

Man 1: “F**k that for a game of soldiers. Get over to the side of the road “

Ariel shot of two men dressed as Big Ben pushing their way past the other runners to the side of the road to get out of the race.

Yes - quite funny although probably not totally original. I'm sure it would've been done before - not necessarily as Big Ben though.

Possibly has been done before, Cheers.

It's definitely lacking something, and unfortunately I think that something is a punchline.

What have you got here? Two guys in funny costumes decide to bail out of a race. We don't expect anything of them and we get precisely that. There's no surprise save for the fact that they quit before they've started and that doesn't make for much of a payoff.

What if they (or even just one of them) were to win? The commentators talk about the man dressed like a giant hotdog in hushed tones, remarking on how he narrowly missed out on the gold last year and marvelling at his athletic prowess. The hotdog man is stoic, resolute and psyched. Then the camera passes over the real runners in shorts and vests, arsing about and playing up for the crowd, and are dismissed by the commentators as a pack of jokers.

It's a starting point at least. I'm sure you can think of something much funnier than this. Personally I always liked to imagine some swine switching the water the athletes throw over their heads with hydrochloric acid. But that gag would only work if it was a charity run.

Agree with David B's first couple of paras. It doesn't really go anywhere for me although I think there's loads of potential to improve- Personally I'd like to see the 'fun' runners win as a group ... a sort of 'hair and tortoise' story!

Quote: David Bussell @ July 12, 2007, 9:33 AM

What if they (or even just one of them) were to win? The commentators talk about the man dressed like a giant hotdog in hushed tones, remarking on how he narrowly missed out on the gold last year and marvelling at his athletic prowess. The hotdog man is stoic, resolute and psyched. Then the camera passes over the real runners in shorts and vests, arsing about and playing up for the crowd, and are dismissed by the commentators as a pack of jokers.

It's a starting point at least. I'm sure you can think of something much funnier than this. Personally I always liked to imagine some swine switching the water the athletes throw over their heads with hydrochloric acid. But that gag would only work if it was a charity run.

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These are totally different sketches, Why don't you write them?