NJ: Compassionate Job Interview

Here's one from last week. Failed.

Dan

===========================
Compassionate Job Interview
===========================
JUSTIN:
This week, research by the Commission for Improving Dignity in Care For Older People, or CFIDICFOP if you'd prefer an acronym that's longer than what it stands for, suggested that being compassionate should be just as important as being clever when it comes to the recruitment of staff.

Personally, I'm all for this as ,during my interview for this position, I didn't do all that well in the IQ test.

LYNDSAY:
(D) Erm, Justin?

JUSTIN:
Oh, that's Lyndsay, our producer. Yes, Lyndsay?

LYNDSAY:
(D) There wasn't an IQ test at your interview.

JUSTIN:
But that bit that I really struggled with?

LYNDSAY:
(D) The only questions there were 'Name' and 'Address'...

JUSTIN:
That does go someway to explaining why I haven't managed to get home for the last two series...

F/XOOR OPENING

CHARLES:
Ah, Miss Gates, welcome to, well, haha, your interview, I guess! Please, take a seat. Myself and Doreen will be interviewing you.

DOREEN:
Hello.

MS GATES:
Hi. Thanks so much for this opportunity.

DOREEN:
Thanks for coming in. You are the... (TEARING UP) look you are the... It's just... (SNIFF) It's just been so hard to find anyone for this position (SOBS, BLOWS NOSE)

CHARLES:
There, there, Doreen.

MS GATES:
Well, that's a shame. I thought it would be quite competitive. It does seem you need some real high-fliers for this role.

CHARLES:
Quite. Everyone we've interviewed seems very, very bright (VOICE CRACKS) but they're not... they're not quite... (SNIFFS) I'm sorry.

DOREEN:
(COMPOSING HERSELF) It's okay Charles, I'm fine now. They're just not (BLUBS)...

F/X:CHARLES STARTS TO CRY

DOREEN (CNT'D):
They just don't have what we're looking foooorrr (CRYING)

F/X:CHARLES WAILS. THEY BOTH SOB AND CRY

MS GATES:
Erm. Okay. Well, I have 5 A* A-levels and a 1st class degree in Business Studies.

F/X:BOTH WAIL A BIT MORE

MS GATES (CNT'D):
I can see now is not a good time. How about I rearrange another time with reception?

F/XHE QUICKLY LEAVES. DOOR CLOSES

CHARLES:
Not right at all.

DOREEN:
Not even nearly. Heartless bitch.

END

Sorry Dan but I hadn't heard the story and I didn't really find this funny.

Another one where I missed the news story, but that is not necessarily a problem for NJ which can go quite obscure. I actually quite like this sketch; on papaer it is perhaps a bit laugh lite, but the laughs would come from the opportunities the sketch provides to the performers.

Boo! Boo the Will Cam!

No, cheers Will. I guess it does depend on the performance (should anyone ever wish to perform it).

Thanks (newly-christened) Tursiops and Will for comments.

Dan