A bit obvious, probably, but I enjoyed writing this one. Also, I listened to episode two again (after sending this) and there was reference to Putin wrestling a bear, so maybe subconsciously I just write sketches I've already heard...
Dan
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Russian Corruption
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JUSTIN:
Russia went ahead with its presidential elections this week despite accusations of corruption so intense Sun journalists stepped carefully away.
With me now is Russian president Vladimir Putin. President Putin, how do your tactics of strong-arming and misdirection work on the ordinary citizens?
PUTIN:
You like to fight bear, Justin?
JUSTIN:
Ah, I think we're beginning to see how your influence works, Mr Putin. You just confuse people into voting for you?
PUTIN:
Hogwash! People have choice. They vote either 'Yes, I want Putin' or 'No, I don't not want Putin'.
JUSTIN:
That's a double negative.
PUTIN:
No, it only count as one vote, Justin, not two. How would election be fair if each 'No' vote count twice?
JUSTIN:
'Fair election' is an interesting choice of words, but that's not what I meant...
PUTIN:
Then what did you mean? You want to fight bear?
JUSTIN:
Look, Mr Putin, you are an intelligent politician and I, as Radio 4 Extra's leading journalist, am wise to your propaganda.
PUTIN:
Justin, perhaps I give you more respect if you fight bear. Without shirt!
JUSTIN:
No, I don't think that's necessary...
PUTIN:
Poppycock! You have physique of man who *like* to fight bear! Release bear!
F/X:CAGE OPENING. BEAR GROWLING
JUSTIN:
Aaargh! No! H-help me, Vladimir!
PUTIN:
Ah, now you think I ideal man for job?
JUSTIN:
Yes! Yes! Call it off! Call it off!
F/XHIRT COMING OFF
PUTIN:
Ok. Now watch how it done! Grrrrr!
END