British Comedy Guide

Why Did The Chicken Cross The Road? Page 2

The chicken crossed the road because it wanted quorn.
Now that is eggcelent!

Why did the chicken cross the road?

Because Chico Silmani was following it singing; 'It's chicken time.'

Becuase it had the ability to walk across the road and felt like doing so at that time.

The chicken wants to walk across the road in peace without people creating a premise of an act they do everyday just so that they can get a cheap laugh by making a yolk about it!

Because it had a dream that one day all chickens would be able to cross the road, without the fear that they might be the butt of some joke.

Because Colonel sanders was on the other side of the road with the secret recipe to KFC.

Because it was in the bucket of KFC that some fat f**ker had just bought from the other side.

Becuase it was a free range bird and could go where it pleased.

Because it had hatched a cunning escape plan from Bernard Matthews (after realising it was in fact a turkey and not the chicken we had all thought).

Why Chickens? Don't Turkeys cross the road as well? Far more amusing in my opinion.

Because it wanted Jesus to forgive it for it's sins.

It was running away from home after years of being hen pecked.

Q:Why did the chicken cross the road?

A:He was bringing the gear round to Whitney Houstons' hotel room.

xXx

Console

It wasn't crossing the road, it was throwing itself under a truck - because it wanted to get to the Other Side.

Or:

Because it thought that behaving anthropomorphically would get it to the Far Side.

The road was being ineffectively protected by borders agency employees.

Because George Zimmerman was following him..

To see Gregory Peck.

Because it was stuffed up Anthony Worral Thompson's jumper.

I was just reading the contributors to Jo Caulfield's blog advice on stand up comedy.

In it someone says there are two things that are always funny no matter what the context:

(1) the word "fingering"

and

(2) bumming (especially if of a tramp)

Q. Why did the chicken cross the road?

A. To finger a tramp it was bumming.

I thank yew.

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