I wrote this after reading an article in the Express about parents forgetting the words to traditional lullabies and rhymes.
Lullaby- Sketch
INT. CHILD’S BEDROOM. NIGHT.
TWO TRENDY PARENTS ARE TALKING TO THEIR YOUNG DAUGHTER WHO IS LYING IN BED.
DADDY: What’s the matter sweetheart?
DAUGHTER: It was horrible. There were these men with white faces. They kept shouting. I was really scared.
MUMMY: Don’t worry darling. You’ve just had a bad dream.
DAUGHTER: Don’t go Mummy.
DADDY: We’re going to stay right here with you my little poppet.
DAUGHTER: Sing me song Mummy.
MUMMY: I don’t really…
DAUGHTER: Please Mummy? Pop Goes The Weasel.
MUMMY: I don’t know that one. (Quietly to her husband) I don’t know any nursery rhymes. Help me out here.
DADDY: (Quietly to wife) Nor do I. Parents don’t sing them anymore. I only know pop songs.
MUMMY: That will do.
DADDY: Here’s one that Mummy knows. (Shouting)
If you like to gamble, I tell you I'm your man,
You win some, lose some, all the same to me,
The pleasure is to play, makes no difference what you say,
I don't share your greed, the only card I need is
The Ace Of Spades.
(Or some other loud rock song)
DADDY: How is she doing?
MUMMY: Out like a light.