Very Small Script Extract - Feedback Please? :) Page 2

Sorry, I'll just re-write that, I meant I don't like this particular passage. I thought they other stuff was 'ok', but, you can't please everyone! I'm sure many many people won't like my stuff, and to be honest, I'd rather a small % really appreciate it, than a lot of people think it's 'ok'.

Look at Curb Your Enthusiasm or Peep Show for example! So many people say 'they don't get it', but for me, they are absolutely brilliant.

Here's a bit of mine. https://www.comedy.co.uk/forums/thread/23085#P826051

It's been re-written several times since I posted it, and I believe I've made it a lot better. Obviously you can't see it in the scenes I have posted up, but I've put a back story to it now. I found by getting a piece of paper, writing out each scene in a few sentences, I was able to link part of the scenes together in order to develop an ending which would be both funny, and bring the whole episode together.

Quote: Danny Boy @ December 7 2011, 4:24 PM GMT

First of all, I take back what I said. You obviously know you're stuff, it's just annoying to hear someone hate on my script without stating a reason, so forgive my previous reply.

Secondly, this isn't the start of the sitcom, I posted that a while ago, and I had a lot of positive feedback. This was just a random scene that I wasn't sure if it worked or not. It obviously didn't, and it's been well and truly canned!!

Thirdly, thank you for elaborating on your opinion. I've not been writing comedy for very long (as you can probably tell) and I have been trying to hone my skills. The feedback in this comment has proved quite invaluable, and the most in-depth feedback I have actually been given yet!

If you are interested for any reason, or have about 5 minuits to spare, here is the link to the first few scenes of my pilot, as I would absolutely LOVE to hear your feedback on that!

https://www.comedy.co.uk/forums/thread/23070/

Thanks again.

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I hope I haven't encouraged you to keep writing. I'll probably look at your other bit.

Don't ever apologise to anybody. Ever.