I don't know *what* I was thinking here. It was late Sunday night and I'd probably overdosed on Rennie...
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NJ: From The Archive
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JUSTIN:
Advertising is like pornography: next to no plot, appallingly acted and, eventually, an excited chap is thrust in your face. This week, we learnt that product placement can be seamlessly retro-fitted to old film footage. It never used to be like that, as we can hear from this footage 'From The Archives'...
ATMOS
LD, 'TOMORROW'S WORLD'-TYPE PROGRAMME
CHRIS:
Something new to hit the television box this week is ad-vert-is-ing.
SAM:
Now, we at the BBC are not allowed to name commercial products --
F/X:TAPE RECORDER STOPPING
HOLLYWOOD V/O:
-- such as Razzmatazz Washing Powder! For whites, whiter than supernova! --
F/X:TAPE RECORDER STARTING
CHRIS:
-- but we'll discuss it a little more generic--
HOLLYWOOD V/O:
-- Viagra! Non-specificity is the *key* to erectile dysfunction!--
CHRIS:
--ally.
SAM:
Ad-vert-is-ing is a new concept to television, allowing companies to sell--
HOLLYWOOD V/O:
-- Typhoon Eurofighters! --
SAM:
-- to specifically-targetted demographics.
HOLLYWOOD V/O:
-- Assassination Unlimited: Targeting *your* demographics...--
CHRIS:
These demographics may not realise they even want these products.
SAM:
And most viewers will claim ad-vert-is-ing doesn't even work--
HOLLYWOOD V/O:
-- Advertising and Marketing plc: make subliminal messaging work for you! --
SAM:
-- but whether it does or not remains to be seen.
CHRIS:
(LAUGHS) Who knows? Maybe in a few years, all old footage will include some ad-vert-is-ing.
SAM:
(LAUGHS) I really don't think so, Chris. That seems ridiculous--
HOLLYWOOD V/O:
--Denial Therapy! Get yourself through the days by convincing yourself reality doesn't exist!--
CHRIS:
Yes, it does, doesn't it?
HOLLYWOOD V/O:
--Breast Enlargement For All!--
SAM:
Well, I hope that clears up ad-vert-is-ing for you all.
CHRIS:
We can't see it being a success.
SAM:
No. Frankly, we think it's a ridiculous idea--
HOLLYWOOD V/O:
--Big Society!--
CHRIS:
--but you never know.
SAM:
Now, from the most ludicrous concept to a sure-fire hit:
CHRIS:
The indoor barbecue...
END