Just started this tonight and would like some feedback as to whether it's worth carrying on with.
It feels a little cliche to me but I don't know if it's ever been done as a series idea before, probably been done in sketches quite a lot.
Enjoy (or not)
ACT I
Scene 1
INT.BEDROOM - DAY
JUSTIN is standing staring admiringly into a full length mirror.
He is wearing a dark purple cloak with red insignias. MAUREEN enters.
JUSTIN
(flourishing)
What do you think, Mother?
MAUREEN
Oooh, I don't think that red goes very well with the purple, Justin.
JUSTIN
How many times, Mother, I should always be addressed as Xytron when I am wearing my grand outfit.
MAUREEN
Don't make a fuss love, just pass me it here and I'll pull the stitches out.
Justin obediently removes his cloak and hands it to Maureen.
MAUREEN
You should try Teal, that's more your colour.
JUSTIN
Teal is neither dark or regal, mother. Maybe black.
MAUREEN
Oh yes son. I'm sure the leaders of the world will be grateful to bow before a man covered in cat hairs and sweat marks.
JUSTIN
That infernal creature should not be allowed to enter my lair
MAUREEN
He's only molting, Justin. Besides, I need someone to keep me company when you're off cavorting.
JUSTIN
(impatient)
Are my minions here yet?
MAUREEN
They're in my parlour. I don't like that Jenny, she looks like one of them Nemoes.
JUSTIN
Her name is Black Widow mother, she's a ruthless assassin of the night.
MAUREEN
She's a mardy cow.
Justin
Just send them in!
Maureen pretends not to have heard.
JUSTIN
Please?
MAUREEN
I don't bloody know, you'd never have spoken to me like that if your father was still alive.
Maureen walks out. COLIN, ANDREW and JENNY enter dressed in their
uniforms of evil, heads bowed.
JUSTIN
I trust you bring me good news? You have acquired the weapon?
ANDREW
We have, oh excellent one.
JENNY passes Justin a long silver tube with flashing lights.
JUSTIN
Excellent! With this excelcion ray we can render Captain Dynamic utterly helpless.
Justin passes the excelcion ray back to Jenny.
COLIN
How do we do that, Boss?
JUSTIN
With considerable ease, Crushbot. We shall set a simple trap. His foolish compassion for the innocent will be his downfall. One of us shall pose as a helpless victim of a street robbery.
Justin, Andrew and Colin stare at Jenny.
JENNY
F**k off!
JUSTIN
Er, naturally the Black Widow shall be required to operate the excelcion ray. Professor Logic will make an ideal..
ANDREW
Can't make it I'm afraid, we're up against the Crown and Anchor tonight.
JUSTIN
(impatient)
The attack is planned for this afteroon.
ANDREW
But it's my turn to make the sandwiches.
JUSTIN
Very well, I shall pose as the victim of the mugging, Crushbot. You shall play the part of the mugger.
COLIN
Okay Boss. (aggressive) Give me your money, now!
JUSTIN
No, don't mug me now, you imbecile!
Suddenly CAPTAIN DYNAMIC enters wearing his hero costume.
CAPTAIN DYNAMIC
Halt! Evil doer.
JUSTIN
Dynamic!
CAPTAIN DYNAMIC
Xytron? You evil creature, what are you up to now?
JUSTIN
(gesturing to Jenny)
Now? (gesture) What do you mean, (gesture) Now?
Jenny ignores Justin. She is staring besottedly at Captain Dynamic.
CAPTAIN DYNAMIC
Be warned, Xytron, I'm always watching you.
JUSTIN
(gesturing manically to Jenny)
What even, (gesture) now?
CAPTAIN DYNAMIC
Always, Xytron.
Captain Dynamic exits heroically. Justin stares after him then looks
at Jenny arms out in exasperation.
JENNY
(arrogant)
What?
JUSTIN
Nothing!