"Movie Trailer - Tinker Tailor Soldier Idiot"
Justin intro:
A good thriller is like Nick Clegg: it draws you into thinking you know how it will go, only later to turn out completely different from what you were lead to believe - but by that stage, no matter how much you want to you can't put it down.
David Cameron's recent revelation that the KGB once tried to recruit him over lunch is just the sort of work of fiction which could easily find itself subject of the next Hollywood blockbuster:
(FX dramatic spy movie music)
Movie trailer voice (gravelly, you know the thing):
This Fall, prepare to find out that sometimes there's nothing worth watching at the cinema... based on a poorly received anecdote by David Cameron, comes "Tinker Tailor Soldier Idiot"
Lady Russian spy:
David Cameron? Can I talk to you? We don't have much time.
David Cameron:
Gosh. Are you Russian?
Lady Russian spy:
Well, I said we don't have much time...
We like to have lunch with people we think could become Russian spies. Have you eaten?
David Cameron:
Yes, I went there for 5 years - is that good enough?
Lady Russian spy:
Excellent - most of our spies come through there.
Movie trailer voice:
In a tale of British intelligence...
David Cameron:
I say. Would you like to recruit my friends George and Boris?
Lady Russian spy:
No. This is a tale of British intelligence.
Movie trailer voice:
Mystery, intrigue, disbelief - "Tinker Tailor Soldier Idiot". Not starring anyone, because you can't credit it.
David Cameron:
Gosh.