JUSTIN:
With the news that thousands of middle-class suburbanites are growing their own cannabis, the police with their usual swift efficiency have sprung into action and confiscated the exotic veg section of every branch of Waitrose. To get a taste of this unusual new phenomenon let's drop in on an ordinary night at the home of Tom and Barbara Bad.
GRAMS - 'THE GOOD LIFE' THEME (OR SIMILAR)
F/X CHOPPING VEG
BARBARA:
(BRIGHT, SUBURBAN) Tom darling, did you remember it's bin night?
TOM:
(LIKEWISE) Yes dear. I've put the wheelie-bin at the end of the drive.
BARBARA:
Thank you darling. And did you pick up the Lollo Rosso for the salad?
TOM:
Yes dear. I bought Italian dressing. Hope that's ok.
BARBARA:
Thank you darling. And did you get the money for the 3 kilos of weed I gave you?
TOM:
No, Sorry dear...
F/X VEG CHOPPING STOPS ABRUPTLY
TOM:
...Our man on the street's got a bit of a cashflow problem so I wasn't able to get it tod...
BARBARA:
...Son of a ***** ****** *****! Get me my money or I'll cut your ***** **** **** you motherflipping piece of *****!
TOM:
I'll get the money! I swear I'll get the money!! (SOBBING) Please don't cut me!
F/X CHOPPING VEG
BARBARA:
Thank you darling. Oh - Jeremy and Margaret will be popping over for dinner. Hope that's ok?
TOM:Y-es that's f-ine.
