I quite enjoyed this one but unused.
Dan
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Boris Goes Fleeing
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JUSTIN:
Revelations came to light this week that Boris Johnson tried to delegate his entire job to other people during his time as London Mayor. In typical fashion, being a floppy-haired, incomprehensible buffoon, he managed to employ a floppy-haired, incomprehensible baboon. Efficiency sky-rocketed.
VOICEOVER:
New! From Newsjack Tactical Strategy Games! A new challenge to rival Civilisation! You are London Mayor!
BORIS JOHNSON:
I s-s-say! What!?
VOICEOVER:
Yes! You are London Mayor! But you don't want to be London Mayor!
BORIS:
No!
VOICEOVER:
No! But you still want the plaudits of London Mayor!
BORIS:
But of-of-of-of-of-of course! Why not?!
VOICEOVER:
Outsource a few tasks!
BORIS:
Yes!
VOICEOVER:
Outsource a lot of tasks!
BORIS:
Yes yes!
VOICEOVER:
Outsource *all* the tasks!
BORIS:
Yes yes yes!!
VOICEOVER:
Try and do as little as possible! Or less! Don't even finish a coherent sentence!
BORIS:
I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-...errrrrrrrr... I-I-I-I-I-I-I flobby lobby blobby dib dab dob.
F/X:FLAPPING CHEEKS NOISES
VOICEOVER:
And, when every last thing is finally delegated, go do something you actually want to, like father a lovechild or go on holiday!
BORIS:
Fanbulissimo!
VOICEOVER:
Boris Goes Fleeing. Available now, offline and in horrifying 3D...
END
END