Seinfeld: George Constanza in 'The DVD Nazi'

Hi

My entry into the 4laughs Seinfeld competition. All feedback gratefully received.

Cheers

Dan

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Seinfeld: George Constanza in 'The DVD Nazi'
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GEORGE CONSTANZA WALKS INTO DVD STORE WITH A SUPERMAN BOXSET

ASSISTANT:
Can I help you?

GEORGE:
Hi

GEORGE STEPS FORWARD, FOLDS OPEN BOX AND HOLDS OUT A DVD

GEORGE:
Disc four doesn't work.

ASST:
OK sir. Can I see the box?

GEORGE LOOKS AT BOX UNDER ARM THEN AT OTHER HAND WITH DVD

GEORGE:
Here's the disc.

GEORGE PUTS DISC ON COUNTER

ASST:
I need the whole box, sir.

GEORGE:
But *this* is the faulty disc. I want *this* disc replaced.

ASST:
We have to replace the whole box.

GEORGE:
But *these* discs work. *This* disc doesn't work.

ASST:
We'll replace the discs and they will all work.

GEORGE:
How do you know they will all work? These three discs work, that one doesn't.

ASST:
We will replace them with a brand new set. Unused.

GEORGE:
If they're unused, then *this* disc may work, but any of *these* discs might not work.

ASST:
Yes?

GEORGE:
And I'll end up back here again, having this conversation again tomorrow.

ASST:
I'm off tomorrow.

GEORGE SIGHS, TAKES OFF GLASSES AND RUBS EYES

GEORGE:
Could I just have that disc replaced? Please?

ASST:
Not... without... the... other... discs.

GEORGE:
(EXASPERATED) You know what? Keep it. I don't like that one.

GEORGE TURNS AND WALKS OUT. ASSISTANT FOLLOWS.

ASST:
Sir! You can't leave us one disc!

GEORGE STARTS TO RUN.

GEORGE:
Leave me alone! I don't want it! It's yours!

GEORGE RUNS OUT OF DOOR. HE TURNS TO LOOK THROUGH WINDOW, SEES ASST FOLLOWING AND SCRAMBLES AWAY.

ASST:
Sir!

ASST RUNS OUT OF DOOR, WAVING DISC.

END
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Lol, that's why I love George. Very good you captured him nicely there. It's a shame we didn't get longer, I would've loved to hear the convo between him and Jerry about the DVD Nazi.

I think, in the main, you've almost captured the George angst. Almost. George doesn't cut and run. 'GEORGE TURNS AND WALKS OUT' was where your script deviated. George is a belligerent man. If he was confronted by an authority figure like the soup Nazi then he capitulates. But if, as in this script, the character is placid, George stands his ground and slowly digs a big deep hole for himself.

A very small point, and sorry of you think I'm picky - which I am, I suppose - but although the title is a nice take on the 'Soup Nazi' episode, the DVD assistant isn't at all like the actual soup Nazi which is where the title doesn't come off. I was expecting George to have a confrontation with a scary and difficult assistant but it wasn't there.

That said, I think this is a nice piece of writing in a believable Seinfeld situation.

Well, just to put a different perspective on this, I've never seen Seinfeld ... been here in Spain for 10 years ... and you gets what you're given TV-wise (plus I lose all the fights over the remote here as well!).
However I liked this piece a lot. Just taken as it was presented, i.e 'cold' to me, the situation was very recognisable (been there!). Nice and tidily written too (and no expletives ... ticks from me!). Can't comment really on how it ends (from established sitcom p.o.v.) ... personally I'd do something different at the end but not sure what. Good stuff.

Cheers Guys, much appreciated.

Baumski

Yeah, I understand what you're saying. Most important thing is: 4laughs character limit (they want about 1000 characters and this one is already 1500) and I wanted some sort of 'big finish' rather than what was effectively a talking-heads scene. Believe me, I could've strung this out a *lot* longer!

The title is an obvious nod to 'The Soup Nazi' as it's the most famous episode. I haven't actually seen that episode and, if truth be told, haven't seen that many episodes all together (maybe twenty or so in total). I've bought all seven DVD sets so far, they're just sitting on my shelf waiting to be watched! But I have to bow to your encyclopaedic Seinfeld knowledge as I can't argue ;-)

I realised the deadline was tonight, so it was a forty-minute start to finish piece of writing.

Cheers

Dan