End of an era

An Eskimo in full garb carrying a harpoon walks into Asda and heads straight to the biscuit aisle and harpoons a packet of Penguins and runs out without paying.

There are three cops behind a two way mirror overlooking the freezer section, they had watched it happen all the way over on the other side of the store and were helpless to act.

The cops are gutted; one hits the desk in rage while another gets on the radio

Cop
"Hello Jenkins this is the stake out team, it wasn't the fish fingers it was the Penguins he was after, who the f**k is giving you this information?"

We see a white matinee glove replacing a telephone receiver.

Although I don't think this actually works in practice, I quite like it.

What are you a PushMePullme?

Or Dick Emerys lad

"Oh you are awful"

Yes, that's what I am...

"But I like you"

Is the punchline for this one: Mona Lisa?

Was the Eskimo Whistler in disguise..?

Ben...... Mona Lisa? have you been Googling?
How the hell did you find that for a comeback?

I have to admire your level of research!To just a pull the work of a 14th century Florentine Artist out of the hat like that?

I can see I'm going to have to be on my toes with you,you wag.

I was working on a piece about Hugo Ball the much lauded Dada advocate (To my my mind he was just a jazzed up surrealist who just happened to be ahead of the curve)

But I've binned that as you would have seen it as being a trite too Vox Pop. Instead I've decided to put up a post tailored to your level.

It may take awhile as I am currently dry baking the the pie base and whisking the eggs for the custard, but bare with me, once I've polished my really big shoes I'll put it up.

Red, I thought you knew that Eskimos don't whistle due to the fact that Polar Bears have remarkable hearing and are known to be short tempered when they think they have tinnitus .

Quote: Teddy Paddalack @ July 17 2011, 7:47 AM BST

a 14th century Florentine Artist

View original

15th century.

That's probably why the joke didn't work.

Do you really think I didn't know?

Oh for f**ks sake this is becoming crass! Do you really think I didn't know?
I go too the trouble of attracting snipers and when I do they still get it wrong!
.
The Mona Lisa is in fact 16th Century, for f**ks sake if you're going to heckle then at least try and get a basic working knowledge of the subject matter.
It seems you'll never be funny, so you might as well at least try to be informative.

Quote: Teddy Paddalack @ July 17 2011, 7:47 AM BST

Ben...... Mona Lisa? have you been Googling?
How the hell did you find that for a comeback?

View original

I have to admit, it was a pretty good comeback. I think I can top it though. I think.

Leonardo was both a fifteenth and a sixteenth century artist.

Bit like us, those who are, post millennium. Spanning two centuries.

Marc the post was about the painting not the painter as such it does not span, if it was about the painter your point would be valid though.

I knew there was people out there, nice to see you and I do actually like the feedback.

Quote: Teddy Paddalack @ July 17 2011, 7:47 AM BST

a 14th century Florentine Artist

View original

People are out there a lot Teddy looking and reading and coming to conclusions. I had nothing to offer you in critique of this sketch if that is ok with you. Of them all in general they read more suited to an animated execution. I am not sure where you see them being placed?

what's all the stuff about the Mona Lisa?