you once give me a piece of sterling advice on a sketch which was a good call.
But that aside from that you sound a bit jumped up, self important and from your profile description, a bit deluded. But anyway, am not getting into an internet-tough-guys word war.
Back to the topic, I didnt get it either but I am totally not the right audience to even appreciate radio monologues.
My profile description is incredibly sarcastic. I'll be the first to admit I'm a nobody. If you want to continue this argument, then feel free to PM as I don't want to clog up James' thread.
Sorry but found this supremely boring after the Jeremy Paxman bit, which also didn't raise laugh. Just couldn't see the point of it at all. Aside from that, you gave away what might have been a good joke by telling the chair tale before filling in the background ( though I somehow doubt the cameras would only have shown his head.
Listened to this a couple of times...
You started off by tell us about your 'great story' you could have told us what the 'great story' was...
The attack on Jeremy Paxman chair and what happened to Paxman didn't visualise clear enough...
'Tea to cappuccino' was ok but you asked us to imagine what you could have achieved in a year, could have expanded a bit here...
The Jeremy Pacman bit was amusing, not sure how many people would actually know what a pacman is though...
Terry Wogan bit came and went to soon, the relieved bit was probably a bit too subtle, leave it in the toilet...
The callers calling in bit, rattled them off too quickly, weren't that amusing, the milkman asking for more directions started off well but you killed it with him asking for more directions...
'Shit isn't swearing' wasn't bad...
Germans and racists, nada...
After 5:30 you mentioned someone called Giles, who is he, where did he come from?
The callers 'winding you up' bit worked well, particularly the wanker skit...
'Time slot' and 'grades' mediocre...
Toyota/Porche analogy didn't work...
The caller with the 'cheating wife' was poor...
Giles not having a girlfriend and depression, ok...
Your girlfriend dumping you via voicemail was good, dragging it out with the bit about you being in the wrong place spoiled it a bit...
It ended rather abrubtly...
The cars screeching the tyres, either go outside and tell them to f**k off because you're recording, or close the window...
I thought your narration ok, sounded a bit 'Jackanory' at times but not as monotonous as your Record Shop piece, you seemed to rush from one piece to the next too often, could have done with a few pauses here and there to break it up some.
Your logline talked about a 'series' of unfortunate run-in's, it was hardly a series, was it? Maybe if you had given us some more Paxman anecdotes it may have worked better, perhaps getting one over on him...
Was I be impressed enough to listen to the second part? Probably not at this stage, a little more work needs to be done first...
Keep at it...
Hi James, well done for working on the project. I think these sort of monologues need to have more cohesive narrative structure. This was a kind of retelling of the first one you did. I also have a bit of a problem with the voice, you seem to have melded a bit of Tony Blackburn/nicey DJ into it somehow. It's also not really coming across that you are a media student. I would really use the University Radio Show for Spicer. Keep your voice at your own age and natural... I much preferred the voice you used here for the character.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nRwnU4TLQGQ
Keep at it. 
Quote: keewik @ July 10 2011, 8:58 PM BSTThough I somehow doubt the cameras would only have shown his head.
It's not real you know?
James you're getting there, bt I'd listen to the criticism.
There's still some filler to go and you could sell us the character a bit more.
A randomly arrogant DJ can be fairly funny. But an arrogant, deluded student who's living in the past (which this character is) is potenitally way funnier.
Marc raises a good point about the voice. I thought it sounded too old for a student.
I agree about the voice, it's too caricature. You're also speaking too slow, which has the advantage of being clear but it's not fun to listen too.
The material didn't pop either. It was like someone trying to tell an faintly amusing anecdote whilst the listener needed a wee. I wanted you to get to the funny and finish the story basically.
Are these sketches intended as an exercise in character, acting and something for your show reel or are you wanting to make a genuinely interesting character, for its own sake? If it's the latter, I do think you need to cut the running time right down to a few minutes. The internet is a fast place, people have short attention spans and better things to look at.
You're spreading him thin at the moment. Give up J.S is short bursts, and leave us wanting more. Have you created a Twitter account for him? You could spew out all sorts of character traits anything that comes to mind. And at the end of the day, review what you have Tweeted and see what kind of person J.S really is.
What you have to understand, Leevil, is that everything you desire will be in episode two.
Like The New Testament?
I like the title.
Quote: Leevil @ July 11 2011, 6:12 PM BSTLike The New Testament?
Christian fundamentalist antisemite
Quote: Badge @ July 11 2011, 6:13 PM BSTI like the title.
So do I.
Quote: Ben @ July 11 2011, 6:08 PM BSTThat everything you desire will be in episode two.
Which will be online very soon.