The Gloves have become mittens, the fox has become decidedly rabbit-like. These issues need to be ironed out.
Foxing Gloves Episode 2 shortish (for me) excerpt
Quite a lot of exposition, do you think that would really work..?
I don't see why it wouldn't work but I'm open to ideas or suggestions.
The scene with Jimmy; he creeps up behind Logan and Nash and when discovered gets flustered and offers to go get some paper, when he returns, now unflustered, he returns the new materialised black gloves and crowbar, why didn't he return them the first time..? Going to the shops seemed to detract from the visual joke of the way Jimmy likes to go around in a sinister 'tippy-toed' fashion...
SCENE 1:
INT. DAY. LOGAN AND NASH DETECTIVE AGENCY - DAY
LOGAN AND NASH LOOK THROUGH SOME FILES AND ARE DEEP IN CONVERSATION.
A SHIFTY LOOKING YOUNG MAN WEARING BLACK GLOVES OPENS THE DOOR EVERSO QUIETLY AND TIPTOES UP BEHIND THEM, HE PLACES HIS HAND OMINOUSLY INSIDE HIS JACKET POCKET AND TAKES OUT A LARGE CROWBAR.
LOGAN SPINS AROUND AND FACES HIM.
LOGAN:
Ah, young Jimmy, you've returned the gloves and crowbar, thank-you very much. Take these papers over to Mr Flifferton, will you, there's a good lad.
JIMMY TAKES THE PAPERS AND TIP-TOES OUT THE OFICE IN THE SAME SURREPTITIOUS FASHION.
LOGAN: (TO NASH)
Strange boy, that one...
NASH:
Mmmmm...
NASH THUMBS THROUGH SOME OLD FILES.
NASH:
Not as strange as some of these, though...
The visual joke is told in half the word count and you have a lead into the 'old files' dialogue...
Ok that was very nicely done. It makes it more compact and still reveals the same amount of info and leads directly into the old cases part. I've been known for rambling on and on. I think I may need you on a permanent basis 
Yeah, RedZeds was a good edit, the crisper version reads better.
I think because the written word NEVER reads the way/voice the writer intends so it seems the less waffle the more the exact idea comes across.
can you post a link to ep 1?
I don't really get this is it really just a losely connected collection of poor puns and poor sight gags?
Otterfox I seem to remember you used to be a lot funnier.
Sorry.
I had a look at the rest, it just seems to be a set of rolled out comedy lines.
The cloth-eared joke is funny but needs more work on it, maybe a RUBS FINGER ALONG THE GATHERED DUST - 'Could do with him around here' punchline.
Lawn mower, needs trimming, completely.
Saint Bernard, a bit 'Johnny Irrelevantish', maybe...
NASH:
Look at this guy, Zilt Flangru, (Silly Name) 'The Saint Bernard Whisperer'. He would whisper 'Saint Bernard' into your ear and you would fall to the ground in a drooling, paralysed and slobbering heap.
NASH LOOKS ROUND, LOGAN IS ON THE FLOOR IN A DROOLING, PARALYSED AND SLOBBERING HEAP.
NASH:
Oh for f**ks sake..!
I didn't understand the 'Aaunseur my buttocks' bit, how would it link to the woman in the red dress...
Link to the 1st episode
https://www.comedy.co.uk/forums/thread/20521#P740341
Sorry to disappoint Sootyj. I'll try and be funnier from now on.
This idea is going down pretty well with a couple of production companies so I'm probably still a small bit funny.
In which case I bow before the superior wisdom of production companies
Quote: sootyj @ July 6 2011, 8:14 PM BSTIn which case I bow before the superior wisdom of production companies
Fair enough.
Quote: RedZed333 @ July 6 2011, 7:48 PM BSTI had a look at the rest, it just seems to be a set of rolled out comedy lines.
The cloth-eared joke is funny but needs more work on it, maybe a RUBS FINGER ALONG THE GATHERED DUST - 'Could do with him around here' punchline.
Lawn mower, needs trimming, completely.
Saint Bernard, a bit 'Johnny Irrelevantish', maybe...
NASH:
Look at this guy, Zilt Flangru, (Silly Name) 'The Saint Bernard Whisperer'. He would whisper 'Saint Bernard' into your ear and you would fall to the ground in a drooling, paralysed and slobbering heap.NASH LOOKS ROUND, LOGAN IS ON THE FLOOR IN A DROOLING, PARALYSED AND SLOBBERING HEAP.
NASH:
Oh for f**ks sake..!I like your idea for the Saint Bernard bit but I'm happy enough with the other bits as is. Thanks for the input, much appreciated.
I didn't understand the 'Aaunseur my buttocks' bit, how would it link to the woman in the red dress...
Oops sorry redzed, I seem to have edited your post. I like your idea for the saint Bernard bit but I'm happy enough with the other bits as is. You have definitely given some great constructive feedback, much appreciated.