COMIC: Diseased

Nice one, Gav.

Couple of thoughts though. I'd would've had a frame with them just looking at each other in an awkward silence after the "Oink!" frame. And secondly, I don't like the 'swish' marks and the drawing of the kid (can never remember his name) in that frame isn't up to your usual standard.

Maybe put a little more motion into Sara too, have her swig her mug at the end? She's a little static imo.

Cool cheer mate.

Good idea on more motion, and I've taken the quality issue onboard.

I'll do another! ta boss

I liked it and the very cute boy cartoon. I didn't understand the 'swish' part though and like Nils said the mom's expression stays pretty much the same throughout.

I think it's because she's not falling for it and looking at him sternly.

Perhaps give her some glasses so she can pull them down slightly and look over them at the offspring. Really intimidates people. But like the concept.

How about a follow up where the kid misinterprets the 'killer cucumbers' headline? Half a cucumber sticking out his buttoned shirt, tomato sauce etc? Just a thought.

I don't want to remove the old one or all previous comments won't make sense so here is the ammended one:

Yep the second one works better. Another lovely idea.

Didn't find it a very strong idea, Gavin. It's not terrible, but not sure if it's deserving of being a strip on it's own. It would work ok as a quick aside in a longer piece. Kind of reminded me of the Garfield comic strips.

I agree with Ben. There's not much of a joke here and what joke you have wasn't clear to me until the second draft. Your other recent posts were miles better IMO.

Not bad, but not as good as the other two.

Fair enough. Can't win em all ta lads.

You have managed a troll-free thread so far though, and that's rare in Critique nowadays.