Quote: sootyj @ April 25 2011, 1:04 PM BSTMarc if I offer to let the chief exec rub my tits for having an Oyster card will you be able to get me a job in Norfolk?
Maybe on that steam train?
But yes there will be some small degree of miming
I just didn't want to type *waves Oyster card at the audience*
It is a very nice steam train.
You could always pull out a real oyster to open.
Hmm good idea Pmeister, but good enough to beat my aversion of props?
I could see most of this working pretty well for a work audience. Lib Dem gag is the best. Being in London the Oyster routine should get lots of recognition points. If anything maybe you should play up a few more work-related things as your audience will be quite specialised. The big question is why you agreed to do a long set for work. Seek help, soon.
Quote: sootyj @ April 25 2011, 1:05 PM BSTThanks, how are you bearing up?
Not too bad thanks, if reading Critique as a displacement activity constitutes good mental health!
You could do a whole string of mollusc and seafood based puns to open before getting to the real oyster card. Everyone loves a pun musseled into an act!
I may use them to winkle my self out of a difficult situation
Quote: Badge @ April 25 2011, 1:08 PM BSTI could see most of this working pretty well for a work audience. Lib Dem gag is the best. Being in London the Oyster routine should get lots of recognition points. If anything maybe you should play up a few more work-related things as your audience will be quite specialised. The big question is why you agreed to do a long set for work. Seek help, soon.
Well I keep thinking I wanting to get back into standup even though I'm very poor at it.
So I figure 15 minute set 200 people should be able to edit together ooh maybe 20 second long YouTube clip to send to promoters.
Also having mentioned at work I'm an alleged comedy writer and everyone else having a go (some very talented bands and musicians) I really had no choice. They deserve seeing the hated boss fall flat on his arse.
Also atleast 2 well known standups have been roped in so a chance to tout my wares as a gag writer.
Oh and it's actually a fund raiser on 6./5/11 so anyone fancy a ticket (£10) PM me for details
So why am I on the bus? Do I love watching Mother London whizzing past the top deck? Am I a Sudoku whizz? Do I uncross cross words?
Nope I work for the 3rd sector.
Why is it called the 3rd sector? Because we get paid a 3rd less than everybody else.
We weren't always called the 3rd sector we used to be called charities, then social business's and pretty soon we're going to be called volunteers. Or to give it it's politically correct title, unemployed.
I like to think of myself as a none governmental worker for justice. Sort of like Batman with a bus pass and no pension.
But as funding gets cut we have to compete more and more with other organisations for funding. It won't change how we do our jobs, we'll never become like Tescos. Even after we've painted the building blue and white.
Still the government is behind us. I opened a hostel for long term street drinkers last week and Baroness Warzi was so impressed she declared it her main London residence. Should be interesting CHarles Kennedy and Ken Livingstone are already sharing a room.
But some times you find yourself in the 3rd sector competing with the government. I mean I wanted to open a home for kindly, good natured types who were easily tricked and bullied by conmen. Turns out the Liberal Democrats have been providing such a service for some years.
And even that service became amalgamated with another project for amoral psychopaths with delusions of grandeur.
No what was that organisation called?
You're the boss then? That's a shame, otherwise you could roast him, so to speak, though you could 'roast' yourself, as it were. I definitely hope a video of this is going up in Showcase!
If there's bands, maybe you could do a comedy song? Also, I imagine some really harsh disability jokes would go down well. I'd offer to write some for you, but I doubt you could afford my 'mad skillz'!
As for selling tickets, where is it and who are these known stand ups?
I'll PM you details when it's all finalised.
Disability jokes? Big no no. Shame I do a mad impression of Joey Deacon I even bring my own shoes.
I'm sort of a middle boss, the big boss and the very big boss will be there.
Quote: sootyj @ April 25 2011, 12:34 PM BSTToo often critique is still just sour grapes.
I thought it all hilarious. Great stuff
Thanks
How you doing Bush>?
Hi sotty, I tried your set at a gigg last night and it didn't go down too well! 
Like the re-write Sooty. I hope it all goes well, good luck.
Quote: John Owen Jones @ April 26 2011, 11:54 AM BSTHi sotty, I tried your set at a gigg last night and it didn't go down too well!
That's because you're a stripper.
Cock out, big smile, jazz hands is all you need.