I've discovered that English is full of nonsensical stuff and it's time someone
sorted it out...
"it was said tongue-in-cheek."
It's almost impossible to say anything with your tongue in your cheek! I've
come to the conclusion that this expession means that the 'sayer" was talking
nonsense!
"He/she spoke too soon"
If you speak too soon you can't know what you're going to say. I've tried
speaking 'too soon' - all that came out was gibberish.
"Put your foot in your mouth"
Apart from having to be incredibly flexible you would also need to have a huge
mouth and or an extremly small foot!
"Never say never"
Who ever dreamt up this stupid saying failed, doubly, to take their own advice.
"One man's meat is another man's poison!
Total bullshit. The meat is either poisonous or it isn't.
Can you tell the time?
Of course not. Who the f**k wants to talk to clocks?
"Every cloud has a silver lining" - Rediculous!
Clouds tend to be shades of grey and, at best, some have a contrasting, paler
grey border - and this is not a common phenomena. SO the saying should really
be: "Some grey clouds have a contrasting, paler grey border."
Not very inspiring now, is it?
"A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush!
a) If the bird is a sparrow it's got the same value as the other two - f**k-all.
b) I tried to get two hands in my bird's bush - but only managed a few fingers!
"An apple a day keeps the doctor away"
I suppose that the doctor in question must have eaten bad apples. The saying
should be: An apple a day keeps the doctor away until he gets better, or stops
eating the f**king apples.
"Making a mountain out of a molehill!
Should be: Only David Copperfield can make a mountain out of a molehill.
