8 things to do before you die.

my 8 things to do before i die are
1. Perform stand-up at all the big comedy festivals
2. go into B & Q's toilet section, take a shit and walk out.
3. go to a gay club and graffiti on the wall "you drop the soap, you die"
4. Discover the cure for chavism
5. go into a public toilet stand at the urinals next to a big burly, facking ard bloke and say "don't worry i don't think anyone has noticed mine is bigger, ow apart from your wife" then of course run
6. run onto a golf course live on t.v and shout "wait i have just realised something really important, there is actually f**k all point to this sport".
7. finish this list.

What is yours.
NOTE: you don't have to do 8 you can just do 5, don't worry you won't be frowned upon. honestly.

1. Perform stand-up at all the big comedy festivals.
2. Sell out and make a TV show.
3. F**k like a stag.
4. Piss off the Royal family.
5. Have a number 1 single.
6. Marry and have children (I'm an old romantic)
7. See a democrat in the Whitehouse again.
8. Destroy Big Brother.

1. Kelly Brook.
2. Finish the list later.

Quote: Lewis Roberts @ June 7, 2007, 6:15 PM

my 8 things to do before i die are
2. go into B & Q's toilet section, take a shit and walk out.

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SlagB does it. His favourite trick is taking a dump on the floor of a cubicle so that the next person who uses it will step in it. And worst of all, this isn't the worst thing about him. When I share a room with him, my toothbrush and toiletries are securely locked away.

Quote: Lewis Roberts @ June 7, 2007, 6:15 PM

6. run onto a golf course live on t.v and shout "wait i have just realised something really important, there is actually f**k all point to this sport".

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But there's no point to any sport.

Quote: ajp29 @ June 7, 2007, 6:21 PM

3. F**k like a stag.

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Quote: Leevil @ June 7, 2007, 6:32 PM

1. Kelly Brook.
2. Finish the list later.

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Quote: SlagA @ June 7, 2007, 10:18 PM

SlagB does it. His favourite trick is taking a dump on the floor of a cubicle so that the next person who uses it will step in it. And worst of all, this isn't the worst thing about him. When I share a room with him, my toothbrush and toiletries are securely locked away.

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Ew.

As for me...

1. Own - and afford to drive - a yellow Bentley.
2. Have a large country pile.
3. Become a Knight of the Garter. Or a Lord. Or both. \o/
4. Complete my DVD collection.
5. See all the great stuff released properly. On DVD.
6. Impose my unfalteringly perfect will upon the world.
7. Save all the kitties.
8. Other stuff.

1. Have 8 men all at the same time.
2. Have a multiple orgasm
3. Be bendy enough to eat myself.
4. Have a non body hair growing body.
5. Kill everyone that pays to see the spice girls reformed concert & get away with it on grounds of principal.
6. Have an orgasm whilst eating a roast & bouncing on top of Colin Farrell
7. Grow one finger that is around 6" long and 2" thick.
8. Eat & never put a penny or a pound on anywhere except my tits.

Editing for no.9.

Kill the founders of the moon cup, by drowning them in blood. The web addy is in my sig.

Quote: charley rance @ June 8, 2007, 12:52 AM

6. Have an orgasm whilst eating a roast & bouncing on top of Colin Farrell

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Plenty of stuffing

I'm still laughing at Colin Barrel.

1. Always shred unwanted financial and personal papers such as bills and receipts before disposal.

2. Recreate every 'serving suggestion' on the labels of all the boxes and tins in my pantry.

3. Back-comb my hair, and carry a rat called 'Elspeth' around with me in it.

4. Fashion an exact replica of the Taj Mahal out of grapes.

8. Learn to count.

BTW, Charley... f**k mooncups, let's all save money and stick egg cups up our fannies once a month.

Quote: Badge @ June 8, 2007, 12:57 AM

I'm still laughing at Colin Barrel.

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Did you like that one then Hun??

Lol Leevill. I do like plenty of stuffing.

In here will do..........

I'd also like to bring back the good old weather presentation style on the BBC.

And Charley, you're obviously very neglected in the bedroom. You poor girl.

1. High Five an Alien.
2. Drop-Kick Richard Madeley.
3. Be able to dance like JT in Saturday night fever.
4. Talk to the Animals.
5. Grow a prize winning mustache.
6. The ability to "Hulk-out" at will.
7. Win an Oscar.
8. Win a bloody 4Laughs comp.

But not in that order! I'd like the ability to Hulk-out before I Drop-Kick Richard Madeley.

1) Write a best-selling novel, that gets optioned.
2) Play my bass on stage with Mark King.
3) Own a vineyard.
4) Have a decent role in a critically acclaimed movie.
5) Design and build my own house.
6) Buy an Aston Martin DB5.
7) Get a degreein Quantum Physics
8) Live until at least 120

1. Ban little stickers on apples.
2. Pass a law that legally obliges women to expose their breasts upon request.
3. Have the rights to the video of Charley and her eight men.
4. Rebrand the Mooncup as the Fanny Funnel.
5. Meet Billy Boy from Phones 4 U ad.
6. Live life all over again. Next time as a cat.
7. Invent something good.
8. Become a millionaire from selling my invention.

1. drive down the west coast of America in the Mercedes from "Hart to Hart" having evening BBQ's on the beach and collecting Abercrombie & Fitch clothing, whilst chasing Dasterdly & Mutley.
2. have a holiday home in Portofino and watch the sun go down as I drank G&T's and listened to Paul Weller.
3. Write an amazing sitcom with Peter kay and kathy Burke and watch it's rise from television to Broadway.
4. Watch England win the world cup and the Euro's live from a celebrity excecutive box filled with canapes and Crystel.
5. Start my own production company and make channel 5 worth watching.
6. Invent an alcohol that doesnt make you depressed or gain hangovers.
7. Join the ryder cup team and sink a hole in one.
8. Stop reality t.v for ever.