British Comedy Guide

NewsJack oneliner rejects - series 4 Page 9

As usual never sure whether the best was used. e.g the Brian Cox sketch. (No offence to the writer but not sure why that was especially topical.) I found the running jokes interesting as I have tried with that format before and got nowhere. But perhaps this just reflects the change in the editorial team. I also think that the show has got a more definite feel but not quite as ossified in format as Now.

Thanks for reading my stuff Dan. Nice to know that there is hope.

The Killing - nice one.

Quote: KLRiley @ March 11 2011, 11:03 AM GMT

As usual never sure whether the best was used. e.g the Brian Cox sketch. (No offence to the writer but not sure why that was especially topical.)

I would say it got picked because it was very much a radio sketch - i.e. a sketch you could only really do on the radio. In the space of a few seconds, one character had traveled round the world. Radio allows you to do that. Good opportunities for sound effects etc

That's always something to consider when writing sketches for Newsjack, or any other radio show. How can I get lots of lovely sound gags in?

Accept that completely. Just why this week? Or is it just me that thinks he's never off the TV?

Well he's back on TV, there were quite a few interviews with him in the press - he's certainly in the news at the moment.

More so than tamagotchis anyway.

Ooh, get me!

Haven't listened to the show yet, but lots of good stuff on here this week.
Did nobody get the memo about the week 5 lull?

I really liked the homeless/pigeons gag, made me laugh a lot. The stuff about facebook suicide and the Rat Pack lines were great, too...

Here's some of my intro/app rejects...

Conservative Minister Ken Clarke has warned that adopting the Alternative Voting system will open the door to an odd collection of politicians. Good news for Lembit Opik, then.

More cuts will mean that police numbers are set to decrease, which explains why we can now dial 112 rather than 999 to call them.

It has been reported that a nurse in Wales has been working for an escort agency on the side. She was asked to perform degrading acts, and was often forced into Master and Servant type roles, which is why she left to become an escort. Plus, she already had the uniform.

If David Cameron wants to support entrepreneurs then how about a government run edition of Dragons Den? Not sure William Hague would take part though, he might be reluctant to announce that he's out.

Sebastian Coe is to appear in a comedy about planning the Olympics? What, another one?

Thanks Dan! Congrats again for getting on.

te: Kevin Mears @ March 10 2011, 10:21 PM GMT

- If Tripoli falls and Gaddafi isn't around to hear it, does it make a sound?

- Being honest with someone is a bit like being in the Rat Pack, it's always better if you're frank. Here at Newsjack, we sometimes make mistakes so here are some corrections.
View Original

First good and the 'Frank' line is excellent!

Thanks RJ, Dan and 3Songs for the feedback, cheered me up no end.

ETA - trying to read to return favour but being summoned.. Will get back to it after a bit of parenting...

Ooh love these

cross porpoises - Big Jack

Rat pack - Kevin Mears

sometimes we forget we're on radio - Radiation

unsavoury sandwich - Dan

Lembit Opik and 999/112 - 3Songs

And lots more but I don't know how to do that multiple quote thing!

Good Star Trek one Clueless.

And the Rat Pack line was great.

I think it should have been "It's always best if you're Frank".

Fab joke, but I still maintain it's too esoteric. Still, you didn't try to second guess, and you went with what you thought was funny. Keep doing that.

Thanks for the feedback - although I think my (5) & (6) were perhaps a tad unoriginal.

But they broadcast the viagra/ laxative gag...

PS I first cracked the "Conservative estimate" gag in my school magazine...under Thatcher.

My hastily knocked out rejections this week were (all Apps/Voxpops);

If Gaddafi wants to sort out this uprising why doesn't he arrest this Ben Gazi chap I keep hearing so much about?

So, the Government are going to "simplify" the State Pension, I assume that's in the same way they've "simplified" the number of troops we have?

ASDA have launched their own dating website, which is okay as long as you want to go out with someone called "George"... and don't mind them tapping you twice on the backside.

Which media organization is Sir Alex going to stop talking to after thieir bad result against Liverpool? My money's on CBeebies.

Apparently George Lucas is going to re-release "The Phantom Menace" in 3D, so that's another dimension it can suck in, great.

Charlie Sheen, the layer of sweat you get from taking too many class A drugs.

Apparently Police tried to text killer Derrick Bird to get him to stop, surely tweeting someone called Bird would've been a better idea.

According to officials, "Too much snow", grounded Heathrow flights earlier this year, something which could also be said for Charlie Sheen's career.

I liked both Charlie Sheen gags very much.

Would Sharia law allow the muslim wife of a circus clown wear a Burkha with polka dots.

If Monet was an impressionist, who was the real one.

In the battle of the sexes, why does the weaker sex invariably win

David Cameron, has decided to go alone and enforce a no-fly zone over Libya by bombing Gaddafi's runways with snow. Why not, it worked at Heathrow.

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