Police Station Interview Room
Tabatha Whittle 28 years old, well dressed, sophisticated London accent. In grey room. Bare walls, table, 3 chairs. No Windows. Office door. Tape recorder on table.
2 smartly dressed people, with tidied up working class London accents face Tabatha. They have A4 notes on table.
Police Officer 1 switches on Tape Recorder.
P1: 11th November 2010, Inspector Firth and Police Constable Coles of Kensington Police are interviewing Tabatha Whittle regarding Kidnapping attempt that occurred this afternoon. Time is now 17:55.
Police Officer 1 (P1) - Thankyou Tabatha for this, I'm sorry you can't go straight home, we just need further details of they men involved in your kidnapping. You must have been very frightened?
Tabatha Whittle (TW) - I was literally terrified, I was like, literally OMG they're going to kill me
P1 - So this morning, you were home alone, at your parents property, and these kidnappers barged through your bedroom door?
TW - Yeah, I was in the study, the main study - I was revising, I was so exhausted. I was literally asleep while reading.
P2 - So you were asleep?
TW - Yeah, so when then they came in, it was so noisy and frightening, it like literally sounded like 20 men rushed in, literally filling the study
P1 - 20 men came into your house, the study?
TW - 3 guys , but like literally they were as loud as like 20 men with horses and shit
P2 - Can you describe these men? Were these men tall?
TW - Giants, literally 10 feet tall all of them, I was literally a Tinkerbell compared.
P1 - ok? I have written here that they wore balaclavas? These 3 men had you blindfolded and cuffed? What do you remember about that?
TW - I hate the dark, I literally die when it's dark, so they like killed me literally with the blindfold. Their hands on my skin, icy cold and just one hand of theirs could of literally covered my whole head.
P1 - they put you into their van?
TW - It was a large vehicle
P2 - was it a car?
TW - bigger than a car, smaller than a lorry
P1 - so a van?
TW - Bigger than a car, smaller than a lorry
P1 - A van?
TW - Um?
P1 - Literally a Van?
TW - YES! It was literally a Van, big, with seats - but when they opened the door - I could tell it was an SUV
P2 - [Exasperated] How did you know that?
TW - I could see, literally my eyes were open and I looked and it was a Landrover.
P2 - You pulled the blindfold off?
TW - Um!
P1 - Did you remove the blindfold, with your cuffed hands?
TW - They scared me, so I shut my eyes, which was like literally a blindfold to this event, whatever
P2 - NO Blindfold?!?
TW -
P1 - Cuffs?
TW -
P1 - So did you see where they took you?
TW -
P2 - Did you recognise where they took you?
TW - Look, it was literally hundreds of hundreds miles and miles, I was super terrified and the guy driving had literally eyes in the back of his head, so I just sat petrified
P2 - How long was the journey, can you estimate? We're really keen to identify where they took you so we can find these men, So think carefully.
TW - Ok - they drove for 5 or 6 minutes, past the school, past the police station, stopped in Iceland then parked outside 14 Cleer Street, the driver led me into the house, asked for my dads new mobile
number, dialled and asked my dad for £50.
P1 - Your dad said he'd been asked for half a million pounds!!!?
TW - But to my dad...half a million is like, literally £50... because he's so rich... I was offended, quite literally, when my dad said No.
P2 - But you then managed to escape? Without them harming you. Can you run through what you did?
TW - I was literally NinJa, using my Yoga moves. I flipped tables as they literally realised I'm BA Baracus in a Skirt, I'm gonna Bin Laden their Arses
P2 Reads his A4 notes.
P2 - You said earlier, to the female officer they "asked" for you to leave.
TW -
The interview is interrupted by another officer who comes into the
room, he has a piece of paper, which he hands to the interviewer.
P2 We've found the Taxi driver, who says he picked you up. From 14 Cleer Street.
TW -
P2 He said the men that brought you to the Taxi paid your fare.
TW-
P2 To quote the Taxi driver, the 'kidnappers' apologised to you when
they got you in the taxi?
TW -
P1 Literally apologised?
TW - I'm starving, literally starving, can I get a Skinny Muffin?
) but I love the idea. People use the word "literally" far too often and almost never in its proper context ("I was literally boiling" --- steam was actually coming out of your ears?), and young people more than old, so well done.