General, General Thread Page 1,847

Hello.

Hi, how are you?

I am fine. How are you?
Weather's great. Wish you were here.

I'm very well, thank you.
I'm glad you're enjoying the weather, please send some this way, ha ha.

Do you really wish I was there or are you just being polite?

I need someone to do my ironing.

Is that a dig at my weight? Because I am very sensitive about that issue.

No, of course not!

I was saying you look like you've been whacked in the face with an ironing board.

Looks like? That's how I get myself off so quickly.

Would you like a biscuit? I baked them myself.

Any special ingredients?...

Do you like things salty?

I know that face, that's the face I normally see when I get my willy out before sex - I didn't know fish had eyebrows.

Mmmmm, shaven sex fish...

I tried waxing one once, what a mess.

Leevil's missus is a sour old trout. Hah.