Adverts

A COUPLE WATCH TELEVISION. THE AD’s START.

VOICE OVER:
When did you last go for a drive? No I don't mean the school run but a drive. The open road - the wind in your hair?

Probably a long time ago wasn't it? But now the Slowcoach Snail from Vauxford puts you back in control.

Our boffins have come up with a new engine management system, that no matter how hard you try, won't let you go above 25 mph.

So say goodbye to those legions of sneaky coppers hiding behind trees as they won't be stopping you for doing 33 any longer. And all those fixed speed, I mean safety, cameras? Give them the finger as you crawl along on your merry way.

The Vauxford Slowcoach Snail - Putting the fun back into driving.

NEXT AD COMES ON THE GUITAR RIFF FROM EVERY BREATH YOU TAKE PLAYS IN THE BACKGROUND

Why not stay at home this year for your holiday? You won't need to pack a camera or camcorder as your every move will be recorded on our network of 4,000,000 surveillance cameras.

And all those drinks and fags. Feel proud to do your bit by paying the hideously inflated prices. Why pay less than a euro for a bottle of beer in Spain, when you can pay £3.50 good old British pounds?

Yes! This year stay in The UK!

The UK! We're ripping you off and watching your every move!

MAN:
Thank God we won the war. At least we live in a free country.

WOMAN:
Yes. I'd hate to live in one of those Police States where the people are so oppressed.

END:

I think this will be all in the delivery but I liked the "The UK! We're ripping you off and watching your every move!" Line imagined a cheesy thumbs up to camera at this line.

Personally I'd cut the man and woman talking at the end make it flow better but up to you mate.

On whole good pacing didnt over stay its welcome and left wanting more good stuff.

No - I think the bit at the end rounded it off nicely.

Hi Blenks

This is really two sketches. As such, I'd make the first one a bit longer banging on about a special dodgy speedo to avoid road pricing and a modifiable tax disc.

Second ones needs a fair bit of lengthening -- I'm sure there's *plenty* about UK holidays that you can come up with.

One sideline -- this line:

You won't need to pack a camera or camcorder as your every move will be recorded on our network of 4,000,000 surveillance cameras

got me thinking. That is a *great* idea for another advert! The whole concept of a company selling holiday videos entirely constituted of footage from CCTV cameras is superb. Write that one!

Dan

Hi Dan

Think you're right about 2 sketches here. Just wanted to make the point about removal of our privacy and rip-offs being all around and imagined these as back to back with a sort of connecting theme. The second one in particular being delivered as a parody of the old Government Information Films.

I'm sharpening my keyboard even as we speak on the other business.

B