British Comedy Guide

Stella Runner

Here's a runner I made a while back. I never feel easy tackling catchphrases and repetition, so what do you think?

1.
Int. Office

Stella - a woman in her early 60s - is sat at a PC as her manager - male, mid 20s - takes her through the database.

Manager:
And this part of the database is a bit complex, because, to print something out, you first need to run simultaneous filechecks, but don't worry, you'll get there in the end and-

Stella:
No, no, no, no, young man! Just because I'm of an age where I've got more grey hairs than you've had hot dinners, doesn't mean I don't know what
I'm doing.

Manager:
Oh no, I wasn't saying that. It's just that it is very complex.

Stella:
(REASSURING) You only need to show me once!

Manager:
Ok, well here's what you do.

The manager does some very fast typing and several clicks of the mouse. A sheet of paper pops out of the printer.

Manager:
Ok?

Stella smiles and then clicks the mouse. The printer explodes.

Stella:
Maybe you could show me just one more time.

ENDS

2.
Int. Office

Stella is working at her PC. Her manager approaches.

Manager:
Stella, I need to head off early tonight, so do you think you could set the alarm? I know you haven't done it before, but-

Stella:
No, no, no, no, young man! Just because I'm of an age where, when I go to bed, I hear the voice of Neil Kinnock telling me to invest in spoons, doesn't mean I don't know what I'm doing.

Manager:
It's just that there's been a lot of crime in the area recently and-

Stella:
You only need to show me once!

Manager:
Ok, well, here's what you do.

The manager beckons Stella over to the alarm board on the wall.

Manager:
Now, the code's (SPEAKS AS PRESSING BUTTONS) 1883. But to set it, you MUST press accept afterwards. Ok?

Stella smiles, pats him on the shoulder and goes back to her desk. The manager puts on his coat and looks at Stella nervously. He goes to say something, but decides against it. He leaves the office. Stella clicks her mouse and the printer explodes again.

CUT TO: Int. Office. Later

Stella is at the alarm board with her coat on. She types in 1883, but doesn't press accept. She walks out.

CUT TO: Int. Office. Next Morning

The manager is stood in a completely empty office with two policemen.

Manager:
They've taken everything! Absolutely everything!

Stella walks in and looks around.

Stella:
Maybe you could show me just one more time.

ENDS

I like number one. Number two would work better for me without the final two lines of dialogue. But if you aren't comfortable writing this kind of thing, why not write something that you enjoy more?

I think you're right about dropping those final two lines, Badge. Thanks.

I only feel uncomfortable with recurring pieces as I've shied away from them previously. I worry that I'm just retreading the same laughs, but maybe it's just a matter of practice.

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