I recently caught up with my friend Keith Plankton and I asked him if he done anything recently. He went on to say that he had done some very interesting stuff so I asked him to name 24 and here they are.......
He once killed a swan with a tooth brush.
He once whistled his way out of a coma.
He once smoked a pipe with his leg.
He once visited himself on holidays.
He once frisked a homeless ant.
He once talked for 30 seconds straight.
He once committed suicide to his postman.
He once caught a trout in an oak tree.
He once vomited in French.
He once swallowed a crow whilst cycling to a chemists.
He once stayed in the bath so long that his hair turned to bubbles.
He once forgot he had a forehead.
He once sneezed coppers.
He once tripped over his own tooth.
He once found a tiny falcon in his ear. He called it Chrissy.
He once thought up of a thing.
He once broke his arm because it was annoying him.
He once sang biscuits.
He once looked up.
He once danced the Atlantic.
He once folded his brother.
He once tried to sell his own neck on eBay.
He once dreamt he was a firework and when he woke up he was on fire.......at work.
He once got attacked by the shadow of a calf.
