The Royal Wedding Page 11

We're going to have fun. I know this because one of the neighbours has told us we will. She is a stay at home mum with nothing better to do so has formed a commitee to organise a street party. No asking first. Just telling us there will be a street party. We've had the list of the food that we are expected to bring detailed to the last cucumber slice. I'm looking forward to the confronation between the Queen Bee's obnoxious son and the local curmudgeon who f and blinds at all children merely for breathing. Probably be the most entertaining thing all day.

Quote: KLRiley @ April 19 2011, 2:25 PM BST

We're going to have fun. I know this because one of the neighbours has told us we will. She is a stay at home mum with nothing better to do so has formed a commitee to organise a street party.

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What a c**t.

The only 'good' thing about this thing is that it's on so early. Makes it a little easier to avoid.

Quote: KLRiley @ April 19 2011, 2:25 PM BST

We're going to have fun. I know this because one of the neighbours has told us we will. She is a stay at home mum with nothing better to do so has formed a commitee to organise a street party. No asking first. Just telling us there will be a street party. We've had the list of the food that we are expected to bring detailed to the last cucumber slice. I'm looking forward to the confronation between the Queen Bee's obnoxious son and the local curmudgeon who f and blinds at all children merely for breathing. Probably be the most entertaining thing all day.

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This is how Nazi Germany got started.

Kill her

Kill her and her son before he's genociding minorities and invading Whitstable.

Quote: john lucas 101 @ April 19 2011, 2:27 PM BST

What a c**t.

The only 'good' thing about this thing is that it's on so early. Makes it a little easier to avoid.

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My feelings entirely. What gets me is that usually we organise a bit of a bash in the Autuman. Tell people when, say where there the BBQs will be incinerating the food and to bring whatever to drink. Good time had by all and let's do it agin next year. The people doing the wedding party have never bothered to turn up to the street barbie and have no idea of how to throw a party.
No, this is like going on a route march. They're are closing the road, which has not gone down well with some people who are saying but we've got visitors. Its a cul de sac so they don't really need to. They are charging for decorations and plates. When I said we have picnic stuff that will do, I was told but this is special. You don't get a royal wedding that often. You'll be pleased to know that I swallowed the obvious reply but the day is starting to fill me with dread.

Quote: sootyj @ April 19 2011, 2:33 PM BST

This is how Nazi Germany got started.

Kill her

Kill her and her son before he's genociding minorities and invading Whitstable.

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Her son will be fixed. He's starting at the same senior school as Riley Major in the Autumn. Shape up or die. And that's just the bus.

Quote: KLRiley @ April 19 2011, 2:35 PM BST

You'll be pleased to know that I swallowed the obvious reply but the day is starting to fill me with dread.

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No, no! You should have made it! Total bastards!

I have no problems with the Royal Wedding, my teatowls are selling like hotcakes. I would imagine its doing a bit to boost the economy.

But being told by a neighbour to go to a street party? Come on Reily. If you don't want to go don't. Simple. And stay at home playing God Save the Queen by the sex pistols at full blast.

Quote: bigfella @ April 19 2011, 5:24 PM BST

I have no problems with the Royal Wedding, my teatowls are selling like hotcakes. I would imagine its doing a bit to boost the economy.

But being told by a neighbour to go to a street party? Come on Reily. If you don't want to go don't. Simple. And stay at home playing God Save the Queen by the sex pistols at full blast.

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I'm not the Ace of Spies bigfella. I intend to drink and possibly drink a bit more and find someway of damaging the obnoxious sprog which will be excused because of the celebrations. However, we'll be hitting Blockbuster for unfestive films.

Great weather, a barbecue down the pub and the missus out at work! Ha! What a day I'm going to have. Don't know if I'll catch any of the wedding in between my scheduled debauches but if I'm not wrapped in a Union jack and dancing round a lamp-post singing ribald ballads by the time she gets back from work it'll be a day wasted frankly.

At Christmas Kunt and the gang had a pop at getting in the Christmas charts and managed number 66. If he'd sold the number of singles he did that week any other week in the charts he'd of reached number one.

So to commemorate the Royal wedding there he's having another go. This time with "F*cksticks".

This is the Ska version and is not safe for work.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XXLrZmHMOVQ

Seven versions from Amazon including the reworked "F*cksticks.....Queen Mothers C*nt" which would make the ideal number one for a Royal wedding.

http://amzn.to/fuJuiD

or

Itunes just search for Kunt

Downloads are up until the 23rd. Spare 79P to hijack some to the royal wedding bollocks and to upset the Daily Mail.

Quote: Ian Fox @ April 20 2011, 12:41 AM BST

Downloads are up until the 23rd. Spare 79P to hijack some to the royal wedding bollocks and to upset the Daily Mail.

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No, because it's a bollocks song.

So you think you'll head for the shops to avoid all the boring 20-hour ceremony on TV, and what do you find? ...

Silverburn shopping centre ...

"Shoppers at Silverburn won't miss any of the royal wedding action on April 29. The centre plans to show it on big screens."

Looks like the moon is the only safe place to be.

Have been introduced to a silly game by a friend. Work out your 'royal wedding name'. The formula is take the name of your maternal granparent dependent on your gender. Then double barrel the name of your first pet with the first road in which you lived. I intend to try this on the fun enforcers next week in the hope that they will be so busy working their names out and they will live the rest of us alone to get on with some quiet drinking.

Nancy Coco-Windsor

(Not bad!)

Isabella Whisky-Wemyss. Omigawd!

Reginald Wolfy-Butler