1. EXT. A COURTYARD.
M. GUILLOTINE IS DEMONSTRATING HIS MACHINE FOR DECAPITATION TO ROBESPIERRE, SAINT-JUST, AND THE OTHER GENTLEMEN OF THE COMMITTEE OF PUBLIC SAFETY.
ROBESPIERRE
So this is you wonderful new invention Monsieur Guillotine?
GUILLOTINE
Allow me to demonstrate citizens. (HE SPIES THAT SAINT- JUST HAS A NEWSPAPER) Perhaps if I could borrow....?
SAINT-JUST HANDS THE NEWSPAPER TO GUILLOTINE WHO CAREFULLY POSITIONS IT UPON THE MACHINE.
GUILLOTINE
And voila.
GUILLOTINE PULLS THE HANDLE, BRINGING THE BLADE DOWN AND CUTTING THE NEWSPAPER IN TWO.
ROBESPIERRE
But this is amazing citizen!
GUILLOTINE
You see the potential?
ROBESPIERRE
Bien sur! Upon an instant a single sheet of A3 becomes two sheets of A4!
SAINT-JUST
(EXAMINING THE PAPER) And with straight edges perfectament!
GUILLOTINE
I don't think you have grasped...
ROBESPIERRE
This will revolutionarise stationery as we know it. France cannot thank you enough! (HE KISSES GUILLOTINE UPON BOTH CHEEKS.)
GUILLOTINE
(EXASPERATED) But it can cut much more than paper. It's for... (HE MAKES A VAGUE CUTTING MOTION ACROSS HIS NECK.)
THE GENTLEMEN LOOK THE MACHINE UP AND DOWN.
ROBESPIERRE
You don't mean... cardboard?
GUILLOTINE BURIES HIS HEAD IN HIS HANDS.
SAINT-JUST.
Ow!
THE OTHERS ALL TURN TO LOOK AT ST. JUST, WHO IS SUCKING AT HIS FINGER.
SAINT-JUST
Paper cut.
THE OTHERS FLINCH.
2. EXT. A BALCONY
ROBESPIERRE, SAINT-JUST, AND THE OTHER GENTLEMEN OF THE COMMITTEE OF PUBLIC SAFETY ARE LOOKING DOWN ON A SCENE BELOW. STOOD NEXT TO ROBESPIERRE IS A GRINNING ARTISAN. ROBESPIERRE HOLDS OUT A HANDKERCHIEF AND DROPS IT.
THERE IS A LOUD THUD, AND THEY ARE SPLATTERED WITH DROPS OF BLOOD. THERE ARE GASPS FROM THE CROWD BELOW, FOLLOWED BY SOBS AND SOUNDS OF RETCHING.
THE GENTLEMEN TURN AND POLITELY APPLAUD THE ARTISAN.
ROBESPIERRE
Our compliments Monsieur Hole-Punch.
END.
