The Chip & P-in
A variation of the Gavin-Bigfella Waltz.
Where you & another poster make a thread your own with a series of Highbrow witticisms & winks that no one else understands.
BCG Achievements Page 11
Quote: Godot Taxis @ October 16 2010, 12:40 AM BSTRAPED IN THE COMEDY ARSEHOLE - 25G
Your sketch is partially re-written by some idiot and people prefer it.
Quote: Godot Taxis @ October 16 2010, 12:40 AM BSTRAPED IN THE COMEDY ARSEHOLE - 25G
Your sketch is partially re-written by Horne & Corden and people prefer it.
Quote: Godot Taxis @ October 16 2010, 12:40 AM BSTRAPED IN THE COMEDY ARSEHOLE - 25G
Your sketch is partially re-written by James Cotter and James Cotter prefers it.
Quote: Godot Taxis @ October 16 2010, 12:40 AM BSTRAPED IN THE COMEDY ARSEHOLE - 25G
Your sketch is partially re-written by The English Defence League and people prefer it.
Quote: Godot Taxis @ October 16 2010, 12:40 AM BSTRAPED IN THE COMEDY ARSEHOLE - 25G
Your sketch is partially re-written by Don Rushmore and Godot Taxis prefers it.
2 PINTS OF LAGER AND A PACKET OF WALKER'S CRISPS - 100G
You sever the career artery in record time.
Don't worry Tim Walkers not his real name.
It's Dr Tim Walker, completely untraceable.
AIN'T NO SUNSHINE WHEN SHE'S GONE - 25G
Your wife leaves you because your moustache isn't big enough.
The Comedy Insomniac
Between the hours of 2-5am, to pathetically click "refresh" on the BCG message board, in the rather optimistic/deluded hope that someone might have filed a new post on a thread about a sitcom you don't like (e.g. Whites). Thus giving you some vague justification for unleashing another 500 words slating the show. However, even if this happens, it only satiates your nocturnal suicidal thoughts for about 5 mins.
Then you refresh the Coming Of Age thread for the next 3 hours, whilst weeping into a semen-encrusted sock, wondering where all those years went...
Maybe it's time for me to go to bed 
One of us
The Cry For Help
To post something along the lines that you really ought to be going to bed/not spending so much time on the BCG/should be getting on with that thing you were meant to be doing, etc...
The loaded subtext of these statement eliciting a quite sympathetic nod from the many like-minded members who trawl the BCG, like melancholic comedy basking sharks - mouths gaping open - waiting for tiny comedy gold plankton to drift in...
Night all! Really must go to bed now. 
The Keanu
Return continuously to the forum playing different characters but always portrayed in the same unmistakable style.
Death and Taxis
Create a thread wherein Godot threatens the life of a minor celebrity.
Walker's Wrists
Make a post in the Coming of Age thread at 3am, thus sending the resident doctor into a 5 hour wank spiral.
The 'Chico'
Any person of limited talent popular with the great unwashed.
The 'Satirical NIMBY'
Any person who adores satire when he isn't the subject of same.
The 'King Herod'
Upon becoming aware of the arrival of one infinitely greater than himself, the KH attempts unsuccessfully to destroy him, causing wailing and gnashing of teeth throughout the land.
Roodeye for the Cool Guys
Spend the best years of your adult life gunning for internet personalities who, in your woefully deluded mind, remind you of the popular kids who bullied you at school.
(Why do Godot's have 25G/100G after them...?)
It's what they're worth I think. 25gold etc.
I think it's gold anyway... 
After reading up, it's achievement points towards your Gamer Score, hence the 'G'. 
Sunshine Kiss of Death
Repeatedly fail to start a succesful game thread.
The Post of No Return
The point whereby escape from the BCG becomes impossible. You will always be there from this moment on.