Insanity

1 INT: NEWSROOM. DAY.

NEWSREADER sits behind desk reading news to camera.

NEWSREADER
The Psychiatric Association has released the controversial new DSM today. The DSM is a diagnostic criteria for psychiatric disorders used by psychiatrists and other health care workers around the world. The latest edition brings huge changes to all previous issues with all pre-existing being scrapped and replaced by just one new classification, known as Bonaparte's syndrome wherein the afflicted thinks they are Napoleon.

CUT TO:

2 INT: FOYER. DAY.
Psychiatrist with beard and glassed speaks to just off camera (where interviewer is standing). He is in the entrance of a psychiatric hospital.

PSYCHIATRIST
Well the new DSM has come as a shock to many but having researched many many films and television shows we found that people thinking they're Napoleon are the only ones consistently deemed insane, whereas people who we would have previously said were suffering with, say schizophrenia or borderline personality disorder, are portrayed merely as free spirits who we can actually learn alot from. It should be stressed the degree of research that went into this decision.

CUT TO:

3 EXT: BUILDING ENTRANCE. DAY.
A flood of patients, still wearing gowns, released from a psychiatric facility rush out and begin causing mayhem. They bang into cars in the car park, one bald man shouts at an old woman passing by and startles her. Two patients start shoving each other and begin to fight. Others throw rocks and other objects etc. The NEWSREADER voices over these scenes.

NEWSREADER
This move has seen unprecedented turnover in psychiatric wards with virtually all current patients being released and many new patients being brought in.

CUT TO:
EXT: STREET. DAY

MAN in Napoleon costume being carried away against his will by two heavies in white scrubs.

MAN
(Screams) It's just a costume I don't think I'm Napoleon.

CUT TO:
EXT: HOUSE. DAY

PSYCHIATRIST holding a clipboard knocks on house door. A white van is visible in the driveway. A man, named NAPOLEON answers.

PSYCHIATRIST
Excuse me, are you (looking at clipboard) Mr. Langdon?

NAPOLEON
Yes

PSYCHIATRIST
And your first name?

NAPOLEON
Its Napoleon.

PSYCHIATRIST signals to van and the same two heavies emerge.

PSYCHIATRIST
I'm going to have to ask you to come with me sir.

NAPOLEON
What? Where?

PSYCHIATRIST
I'm afraid you're suffering from Bonaparte's syndrome but we can help you, show you that you aren't really Napoleon.

NAPOLEON
No this is a mistake. Napoleon is just my name. My parents gave it to me.

The Heavies grab him and start to bring him towards the van.

NAPOLEON
Noooo! There's nothing wrong with me!

CUT TO:

INT: FOYER. DAY

Back to PSYCHIATRIST talking

PSYCHIATRIST
It has been a huge turnaround for us and as yet treatments for Bonaparte's syndrome have largely been unsuccessful. We have mostly been degrading patients, scaring them. treating them like children and in many cases carrying out shock therapy and lobotomies.

CUT TO:

7. INT: HOSPITAL. DAY

Patients with lobotomies walk around like zombies drooling. A female patient's hair is sticking out and smoking (from shock therapy). One patient sits in a ball crying.

CUT TO:

8 INT: FOYER. DAY.

Back to PSYCHIATRIST speaking.

PSYCHIATRIST
People have been critical of the new measures but that was inevitable, after all, psychiatrists are supposed to be the baddies.

I'd love to get some feedback on this if anyone would be nice enough to bother reading it.

O0o0o00oh, Ark at you

I think the premise is brilliant, but it needs defluffing a bit.
For example, I'd cut the first para down to:

NEWSREADER
The Psychiatric Association have caused controversy today, launching a new mental health diagnosics criteria. The changes mean that all previous issue classsifications will be scrapped and replaced by just one new classification, known as Bonaparte's syndrome (pause) wherein the afflicted thinks they are Napoleon.

Also, I'd cut the home visit out, and end with a cut back to the studio, like wrapping up the next story, and I'd end on a napoleon joke. "The sympoms of Bonaparte's syndrome have been extended to cover all those wearing tri-corner hats, the vertically challenged and all French men". Well, not that, but you get what I mean.

It's a great joke and very original.

But way to long, to little pace and you explain too much.

Show all the action and then explain about the syndrome at the very end,

Quote: sootyj @ September 16 2010, 3:09 PM BST

Show all the action and then explain about the syndrome at the very end,

View original

I disagree with this! I think the gags are going to be so visual, and if you try to use the syndrome as a reveal, you will have ruined the punchline by the time you get to that point.

Not if you accelerate it then the action becomes the joke.

Starting off with a man dressed as Nelson, then a man called Nelson, then Nelson Mandela and finally Nelson's column.

The audience will be both amused and confused.

Jokes are called riddles for a reason.

That would work if it were a sketch about Nelson, Sooty you idiot.

Dang just relaised I did get the 2 mixed up.

The psychiatric illness gags are a bit offensive.

But then it's still man called Napoleon, man dressed as Napoleon, Sarkozy scrasthcing his arm pit.

Cheers guys, might try to cut it down a bit. Though I'll be sticking with Napoleon, not Nelson.