Veronica Vestibule's first job was on Art Attack polishing and inflating Neil Buchanan's massive white trainers.
Make an unfounded claim about the poster above you Page 48
Dribs and Drabs used to be Dribs and Trabs until Trabs ran off with Dribs wife.
What an absolute cad.
Will Cam ran interference for Radio Luxembourg.
Roscoff had a date with Destiny but Destiny called it off because she was washing her hair.
Tuumble is a tub thumper. He thumped Clair Short's tub so hard that it broke and she had to call out a pimlico plumber on expenses. Thousands!
Alfred J Kipper (one of the Windsor Kippers, I think not) once dated Lionel Blair. I think we all know who was the donor and who was the patient in that relationship.
Dirty boy.
Talking of Windsor, Will Cam makes a big thing every yuletide of showing everyone his Royal Christmas card, from the Windsors themselves. This rare privilege has got him into many a Christmas stocking worn by the nice girls on the posher side of town.
What he doesn't tell them is he started getting it after being shot in the arse by a 'wayard' Prince Phillip one morning after Will's dog wandered into their land.
Alfred J Kipper actually has no discernible face. He lost it in a poker game gone mad in the outskirts of Bulgaria and proceeded to live his life as a masked avenger called Captain Byron.
Also, he's addicted to dusted Llama Tails. In brine.
There are three internationally recognised grades of cream filling in a custard cream biscuit.
1. Dense - Top luxury brands such as Harrods, Fortnum and Masons
2. Semi-dense - Middle class brands such as M&S, Sainsburys
3. Olijba - Aldi
Will Cam once took part in a Houdini style escape hanging over a bridge with shark infested water below. If he didn't do it in time, he would fall to his death.
We're still waiting.
Ellie JP is not currently spending £20 per week on batteries.
Maybe that's where my cash was going.
Veronica is so anal about things being clean she can't type on a key board without wiping each letter individually with sanitiser wipes before pressing a key.
The JP in EllieJP stands for Jangling Pineapples
Roscoff doesn't actually exist. He's merely a collective hallucination by us all... dreamt by a rabid badger.
olijba spelt backwards is 'temporary traffic lights'.