British Comedy Guide

Make an unfounded claim about the poster above you Page 111

Big Jack is upset because someone calling themselves Bigger Jack has moved in next door.
Rumours that Biggest Jack is also looking for property in the area are as yet unverified.

Steve Sunshine truly believes the soundtrack to Labyrinth is David Bowie's greatest work.

Jack Daniels is the BNP's favourite person. He embodies their principles perfectly.

Bill Jaguar came over to our country and stole all of our jobs.

Jack Daniels is the son of Paul Daniels.

Nigel Kelly is the wife of Matthew Kelly

Tuumble is the second cousin of tumbleweed.

Bill Jaguar features on the middle pages of Alistair Darling's recently published memoirs.

Dirty boy.

Will Cam has a little black book. Only, instead of being full of ladies phone numbers, it's full of the names of black men that he dreams about.

Since 1998, when Mars confectionery changed the name of Opal Fruits to Starburst, an angry John Lucas 101 has been on masturbation strike in protest. By the turn of the century his man-goo was trickling out of his ears - but now it's cascading down his staircase and into the Close. A Mars spokesperson said 'We at Mars don't give a f**k about this, and the name stays. As for Mr 101's neighbours - tell 'em to buy canoes'.

Juan Kerr has one willy longer than the other.

Tuumble cried during the scene in Short Circuit 2 when they smash the robot up.

Quote: Nigel Kelly @ August 30 2011, 12:42 AM BST

Jack Daniels is the son of Paul Daniels.

Off Topic, but Trivia-tastic all the same. Paul Daniels' son owns a magic shop in Wigan inventively called 'Paul Daniels' Magic Shop' but last year was busted for *unsubstantiated* claims of drug dealing on the premises. He offered pot to a news of the world reporter.

I like that story, not a lot, but I like it... huh huh.

Jack Daniels fell into a Discworld novel. It is said that Cohen The Barbarian tried to hack him to bits, he hasn't been seen since.

Jack Daniels can't hold his liquor.

Big Jack lost his liquor so he hit the harder stuff.

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