INTERIOR: MARK AND JEREMY'S FLAT FROM PEEP SHOW. THEY ARE SEATED.
MARK
Are you sure we could write a sitcom?
JEREMY
Of course, it's easy! We just have write what we know, and what do we know more about than ourselves? Except we'll call them, I don't know, something like David and Robert.
MARK
I see, so David will be the educated, responsible one, like me, and Robert will be...?
JEREMY
Well I thought he'd be just like me except it might be fun to make him deluded as to his own capabilities, you know, always starting hopeless schemes which any idiot could see should have been drowned at birth. But hilariously he just can't see it!
MARK
I see...
JEREMY
But I really really think we could write a brilliant sitcom. Really really really.
MARK
So if Robert had said that, he'd have been hopelessly deluded? And it would end in disaster?
JEREMY
Yes! Unlike the really really brilliant sitcom we're going to write, they would write a rubbish one, which gets commissioned, and even gets as far as becoming a pilot, before it all goes horribly wrong and is cancelled.
MARK
It's all a bit unlikely, isn't it? How would their sitcom get as far as being made into a pilot?
JEREMY
Mark, it's a sitcom, unlikely things happen. Who knows, maybe David and Robert are incredibly successful elsewhere and no-one dares tell them they're wrong? Maybe giant space aliens come down and put acid in everyone's drinks?
MARK
Or maybe it really IS a brilliant sitcom but they choose to cancel it themselves?
JEREMY
[SARCASTICALLY] Yeah, right.
END
