A GENTLEMAN IN A PRISTINE DESIGNER SUIT HOLDING A BRIEFCASE IS SLOWLY MAKING HIS WAY THROUGH A FARMYARD FIELD.
OUT OF NOWHERE, BIRD DROPPINGS APPEAR ON HIS SHOULDER. HE LOOKS UP AND SEES A FLOCK OF CROWS.
MAN: Oh, poo.
THE MAN TAKES A HANDKERCHIEF OUT OF HIS POCKET AND ATTEMPTS TO WIPE AWAY THE WHITE MESS.
HE CONTINUES WALKING UNTIL WE HEAR A LOUD SQUELCH. THE MAN LOOKS DOWN AND SEES THAT HE HAS STEPPED IN A GIANT COW PAT.
MAN: Oh, crap!
HE TAKES THE SAME HANDKERCHIEF AND CLUMSILY ATTEMPTS TO WIPE AWAY THE MESS ON HIS DESIGNER SHOES.
SUDDENLY, MECHANICAL WHIRRING CAN BE HEARD. HE LOOKS BEHIND HIM AND SEES A FARMER BEHIND THE WHEEL OF A LARGE INDUSTRIAL FERTILIZER, SPRAYING OUT LARGE AMOUNTS OF MANURE.
THE MAN ATTEMPTS TO RUN, BUT TRIPS OVER UNTO THE GROUND.
MAN: Shit, shit, shit!
THE INDUSTRIAL FERTILIZER PASSES HIM BY, CAKING HIM IN MANURE.
AS HE LIES ON THE GROUND, HE SLOWLY WIPES AWAY THE MANURE FROM HIS FACE. HE NOTICES A FLYER ON THE GROUND. IT HAS A PICTURE OF A SMILING, TOPLESS ELDERLY MAN HOLDING TWO THUMBS UP.
HE WIPES THE MANURE AWAY FROM THE BOTTOM OF THE FLYER, WHICH READS: "JOIN THE MCCARTHY FARM OVER-50'S CHARITY NUDE FUN RUN IN AID OF TESTICULAR CANCER! MONDAY, MAY 10TH"
HE CHECKS HIS ARMANI WATCH. THE DATE READS "10/5/10".
MAN: No...
THE SOUND OF STAMPEDING IS HEARD. HE LOOKS BEHIND HIM AND SEES A LARGE GROUP OF NAKED ELDERLY MEN RUNNING TOWARDS HIM.
MAN: BOLLOCKS!
THE NUDE ELDERLY MEN RUN RIGHT THROUGH, WITH SOME TRIPPING AND FALLING OVER THE MAN.
