Here's one me and Jane wrote. Rejected too. I don't think the production team are that keen on football to be honest.
Dan
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FRENCH ECONOMY CLASS
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MILES:
The French international team were punished for their economy class performances in the World Cup by being made to return to France by economy class air travel. Some would say they played like donkeys, but donkey rides may have been seen as some sort of reward.
F/X
ASSING PASSPORT OVER. FLICKED OPEN.
CHECK-IN DESK:
(IRISH) Ah, Mr Henry, to be sure! Welcome to Ryan Air!
THIERRY HENRY:
I've heard your airline draws us in with its promises then turns out to be very costly.
CHECK-IN:
Much like your team's performances (LAUGHS JOVIALLY) At least we offer good value.
THIERRY:
Excusez-moi?
CHECK-IN:
You just pay for the seat. If you want anything else it's extra.
THIERRY:
Well, I suppose in these austere times, that is understandable.
CHECK-IN:
So, that's an extra 1 million euros for a handball.
THIERRY:
What?
CHECK-IN:
A handball. One million euros extra.
THIERRY:
(SHEEPISH) But I don't want a handball...
CHECK-IN:
Neither did we, Mr Henry. Neither did we. And it's a further two million to make sure there are no other Irish people on this particular flight.
THIERRY:
(NERVOUS) That all seems more than reasonable. Can I just request one more thing?
CHECK-IN:
Of course, sir. Anything at all.
THIERRY:
(WHISPERS) How much to ensure I'm not sitting next to our manager, Raymond Domenech?
CHECK-IN:
Oh, I'm afraid there's a twenty million euro surcharge for that, Mr Henry.
F/X:TRIUMPHANTLY SLAMS PASSPORTS DOWN ON DESK
THIERRY:
(MUCH HAPPIER) Cheap at twice the price! Put all 23 of us down for that, please!
END