British Comedy Guide

Foxy business

THIS IS A RADIO SKETCH DENZEL IS INTERROGATING SOME ONE IN A CELLAR, WATER DRIPS.

DENZEL
We know who you are. We know who you work for. All we want to know is where your friends are.

SILENCE

FX DESK BEING SLAMMED.

DENZEL
Tell me damn it! Where are your friends?

FX DOG BARKING.

DENZEL
Don't try that excuse with me.

FX DOOR OPENS TIM ENTERS THE ROOM

TIM
Officer Denzel what on earth is going in here? Why have you got a dog in the interrogation chamber?

DENZEL
He's not a dog.

TIM
4 legs, waggy tail, wet nose I know what a dog looks like.

DENZEL
He's an undercover fox. The red bastard.

TIM
What on earth are you talking about?

DENZEL
Foxes Tim, Foxes they're the new terrorist threat. Rifling through our bins, pooing on our lawns.

TIM
They're just foxes. People make jolly films about them.

DENZEL
Oh really? James Fox, Micheal J Fox they own the media. Foxtons the estate agents? They tell us where to live!

TIM
Denzel control yourself! You've been working to hard a holiday might be an idea.

DENZEL
I'm sorry. A holiday could be a good idea.

FX DENZEL LEAVES

TIM
Finally he's gone.

FX DOG BARKS

TIM
He didn't water board you. You just needed a bath.

I'd been worried about reading any Fox sketches, but this is a good idea.

I just don't get the 'water board' punch. What have I missed?

Yeh weak punch waterboard jokes never seem to work, oh well I'll work on it

not newsjack friendly either

Yeah, I think the 'fox' story might be like weak punch at a party - best avoided.

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