I have just posted this in this week's skit comp (subject is pain). Not sure if I should post it before the comp is finished (is it cheating?) but seeing I now have 400 posts and have only ever posted one sketch for critique.....
INT. DAY- MODEST KITCHEN/DINER. 40 YEAR OLD PLAIN LOOKING JULIE IS SEEN FROM THE WAIST UP BEHIND A BREAKFAST BAR SEPERATING THE KITCHEN FROM THE DINING AREA. BEHIND HER THE OVEN IS ON WITH SOMETHING COOKING. ON THE WORKTOP IS A PILE OF HALF FINISHED SLIPPERS WITH A SEPERATE PILE OF FUR EDGING. ONE SLIPPER HAS THE EDGING HALF STICHED ON WITH A BIG NEEDLE VISABLE. THERE IS A CORDLESS PHONE IN FRONT OF HER WHICH STARTS TO RING
JULIE (ANSWERING PHONE - WE CAN"T HEAR THE CALLER):
Hi Sis....Oh nothing really, just got Dave's dinner on...........Yeah the kids are fine, Molly's got church choir tonight and James is helping out at the Elderly Centre....(LOOKS AT PILE OF SLIPPERS, PULLS QUIZZICAL FACE, SPEAKING SLOWLY). It's.. going.. ok , but I'm not really sure about working from home.
JULIE PICKS UP ONE OF THE FUR TRIMS AND STARTS TO FIDDLE WITH IT WHILE SHE CONTINUES:
I Mean, the extra money is handy, and its not exactly rocket science.
A KITCHEN TIMER SHAPED LIKE A PEPPER STARTS TO RING IN FRONT OF HER. JULIE LOOKS ROUND AT THE OVEN:
JULIE : Oh, hang on a sec sis..
SHE PLACES THE PHONE AND FUR DOWN AND TURNS OFF THE TIMER. SHE PICKS UP AN OPEN BOOKLET LOOKING FROM IT TO THE OVEN A FEW TIMES BEFORE READING OUT LOUD:
JULIE: Leave for twenty minutes then beat...
JULIE THEN WALKS AROUND THE SIDE OF THE BREAKFAST BAR (IGNORING THE COOKER) REVEALING THAT SHE IS WEARING A LEATHER MINI SKIRT, STOCKINGS AND THIGH LENGTH BOOTS. THE CAMERA PANS ROUND TO FOLLOW HER AND WE SEE A NAKED GIMP MASKED FAT MALE CHAINED SPREAD-EAGLED TO A LARGE BONDAGE CROSS ON THE DINING AREA WALL. JULIE WALKS UP TO HIM, STOPS TO CONSULT THE BOOKLET VERY BRIEFLY AND GIVES HIM AN ALMIGHTY KICK IN THE BALLS WHICH GIVES OFF A SICKENING SOUND. THE MAN GIVES A LONG MUFFLED GROAN. SHE LOOKS BACK IN THE BOOKLET THEN VERY DELIBERETLY TWEAKS EACH NIPPLE IN TURN CAUSING MORE MUFFLED SCREAMS. JULIE CLOSES THE BOOKLET, LOOKING QUITE PLEASED WITH HERSELF, CASUALLY WALKS BACK AROUND THE BREAKFAST BAR, PICKS UP THE TIMER, RESETS IT, AND PICKS UP THE PHONE:
JULIE: I think I'll give it to the end of the week, and then I might try something else. (PUSHING ALL THE SLIPPERS AND FUR TO ONE SIDE) I do wish Dave would stop leaving his stuff all over the place.
ENDS
