This is another short documentary which I presented for Exeter Phoenix.
Enjoy and all feedback welcome.
Many Thanks
Dan
The Phoenix
The whole thing reminded me of, well, how can I put this...You know when a little kid wins a competition to go and present something for Blue Peter? It was kind of like that. They read some words to camera, but without any real charisma or presence.
My advice: inject some passion into the piece, and maybe add a little humour too. 
Have to agree with Don here Dan. both the presenting and interviewee were flat and didn't really do much for me I'm afraid.
Quote: don rushmore @ May 1 2010, 1:26 PM BSTThe whole thing reminded me of, well, how can I put this...You know when a little kid wins a competition to go and present something for Blue Peter? It was kind of like that. They read some words to camera, but without any real charisma or presence.
My advice: inject some passion into the piece, and maybe add a little humour too.
I found that comment both funny and a bit harsh. More harsh then funny though.
Is it meant to be a comedy? I only ask because I don't think so, unless you count the bit about comparing the size of theatres (Plymouth's got a big one, etc). If it isn't, I don't really know what feedback you are after from the Critique part of the British Comedy Guide forum.
Have to agree with the others.
Why did you lock him in a dark cupboard for 90% of the documentary!? And the torch in his face was just weird, it reminded me of one of the judges at the start of Superman. Guilty!!!
Presumably it's a beautiful old building that he could have given us a tour of.
Why are you presenting what seems to be little more than coursework?
C'mon if nothing else write something.
But do something for the original. Otherwise we're just poking through the leftover of your media studies course.
Quote: Badge @ May 2 2010, 4:47 AM BSTIs it meant to be a comedy?
No it's not met to be a comedy.
thank you for your replies so far, no it isn't a comedy,
I don't think the lighting is to much of an issue and maybe I want to present for Blue Peter 
I wouldn't mind presenting Blue Peter if I get to work with her
I think you mean you wouldn't mind rather than that you would. Unless you really would mind, mind.
Quote: Badge @ May 2 2010, 5:46 PM BSTI think you mean you wouldn't mind rather than that you would. Unless you really would mind, mind.
That's what I said 
Blue Peter had given us some good presenters e.g. simon who now presents sky sports news 
And let's not forget that woman who's always fishing for a compliment 
on the note of Blue Peter presenters I take it this forum is now shut lol