The worst job interview you've had Page 2

Once I had to reapply for my old job, When the interviewer asked for my skillset, I listed all I could do. When he interrupted and said "Tell me, is there anything you can't do?" I said "Yes, impress you."

A month later they (re)hired me as no one was trained to do my role. I spent 10 minutes each day standing at the photocopier next to his desk copying any old tat, because my grinning face and the noise of the rattling photocopier visibly irritated him.

When he was sacked, I made a special trip of offering my condolences, while photocopying an extra big bundle.

I try to be nice, honest.

Quote: lewisroberts @ May 3, 2007, 6:44 PM

what was the job charley and is the boss regretting saying "your hired"?

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I didnt get that job hun. It was for a Sales position selling computer software. It was a lotus notes package. Thats how long ago it was. I suppose they did not want a snotting pissing rep. for their company. Finickey bastards.

It wasn't Charley's eggs you had to collect was it?

Quote: charley rance @ May 2, 2007, 2:56 PM

Needles to say I did not get the job.

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Some interviewers are so picky.

Quote: Ed Parnell @ May 3, 2007, 5:09 PM

One guy went into great lengths telling me abour expenses and pensions and company cars "Any I haven't mentioned?" he asked. "Yes. You didn't mention the fastest mammal in Africa" That time I was escorted from the building.

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That was genius, Sir. They escorted the wrong guy out of the buiding.

OMG!!!
Fancy being asked to interview for your very own job. Poor Slag A.

Thats like being made to eat your very own cooking.

I have son guinea pigs for that.

I was an Ann Summers rep once (I was pregnant so no-one else would hire me - but being pregnant is good news as far as being an AS rep goes... ugly prospective clients think 'Cor, she uses AS stuff, and someone must have f*cked her... I'll give it a go!')

Anyway, I digress... so, I'm at the interview with the woman who will be my boss, and she brings out this massive dildo, and it's a really grubby looking flesh coloured rubber thing - gross! She says to me 'when you run a party you need to have props... I bring Norman here with me' I couldn't resist, and retorted 'pleased to meet you' as I shook the fallus by it's ... shaft; fully expecting her to storm off as soon as the naughty words tumbled out. However she loved my humour and hired me on the spot.

I gave up the job once my baby came though, as I didn't fancy the thought of mini Stylo finding my stock cupboard and trying to play happy families with a pack of 'well hung male models' playing cards.

I had a similar interview Stylo but unfortunately there was no dildo involved. He also hired me on the spot.

I had a nose bleed in an interview last week. I'd just ran a mile up the road because the underground is shit.
I suppose they'll remember you that way.

But I'm still unemployed.

I am going through the interview stages at the mo.
Why does my belly always grumble during them?

I was at a job interveiw, things were going quite well, then the interveiwer started laughing to himself and said "What we're actually looking for is a short fat engineer and you seem to fit the requirement".

If I'd been an American I suspect I could have sued them (although technically he was correct ')

I was offered the job and took great delight in turning them down.

My worst interview was probably the first one I had. It was for the position of a trainee architectural technician and it was apparent very quickly that I had no idea what one did and the interview finishedf rapidly with:

"You don't really want this job do you?"
"Not really, no."

So ended my only chance of building a carbuncle to piss off Prince Charles.

I was 50 and had been with the company 30 years. The whole of the staff were to be tested with English/maths/problems/tasks etc and the end result would be that the best would get the top jobs.
In the final interview I was asked what my faults were and I replied that if one got to 50 and still had faults, there was something wrong with them. I argued the point that surely at my age, I would have corrected anything wrong in my personality or anything I was doing wrong in the workplace (I was a manager)
A full blown arguement ensued and I suspect that from that he spotted my flaw....arguementative. LOL
Anyhow with all the other exam results, I came in the top ten percent of all the staff in the country. I wasn't offered the promised job, nothing much happened, it was a ruse to get rid of the 50s and over, so I took the redundancy on offer and left.
Before I left, I was responsible in the NorthWest for feeding in all the results of the exams of other staff. Top bosses were getting 4% for maths and 20% for English etc. The exams were of GCE level. I'd got 74% maths and 84% english. Those bosses kept their positions.
A year down the line there was no one over 35 left at that particular branch

I went for my first teaching job in a heatwave. I had nothing smart but cool to wear, so whizzed into Sainsburys and bought a nice top. I put it on and checked myself in the mirror. I realised I could not wear it as my nipples were clearly visible. In a panic I tried stuffing down tissues, anything, but no, they just carried on poking out. I had to cover them with my only smart jacket that was black and very warm. They kept asking me at the interview if I was all right as I was so red in the face and clearly overheating.

Applied for lecturing post in Greenock [near Glasgow]. Set off at 5.30 a.m. Changed at Crewe and Glasgow. Arrived at Greenock railway station. Was 15 minutes early. Got a quick guided tour from a pleb who said that some part-time flewsy had it sewn up. Invited into interview by a dour faced Scotsman to be faced by 8 other dour faced Scotsmen and women. Gave out my well thought through planning for a new curriculum which wasn't looked at and pushed to the side. Then one of them took out a stop watch and said you have fifteen minutes. A piece of paper was shoved in front of me with 5 questions.
I floundered around for 5 minutes, stood up and said 'You are undoubtedly the rudist bunch of b*stards I have ever met.' And walked out. A long way to swear at someone. Met a nice nurse on train ride home though.