The Devils Blurb: Episode 1

This is going to be unpopular due to most of you wanting to do an origin story but I really think we should keep a little mystery about the characters origins at this early stage.

Intro

Main Plot

Dev is assigned the new girl to look after on her first week and has to show her the ropes. Elza has given the new girl a quota of souls to fill by the close of business Friday which she is clearly incapable of achieving. So Dev and New girl (Call her Katherine?) Have to come up with a plan to collect souls by “any” means necessary. They fall 1 soul short at 4.56 on Friday and Dev despairs. Link to Subplot.

Sub Plot

Jeremy the record exec was so moved in the audition room he fell in love with Charlotte and proposed
Jeremy and Charlotte Marry
Jeremy begs Charlotte on their wedding night; He has become alienated from his working peers as they heard Charlotte’s singing as it really was.
She sings for him and the illusion is shattered. He becomes obsessed that she’s making fun of him and become angry on thing leads to another and she is thrown form the baloney of the honeymoon suite.
Charlotte is lying face down on the pavement, Jeremy the record exec comes down freaking out Dev smiles and approaches – “I think I’ve got something that may interest you.”
Fade Out
THE END

Ok now lets have just a quick brainstorming session about the plot of ep 1 any questions comments ideas to make it better. I don't want to spend to long on this lets say Sunday 29th 7.00pm will finalise it and we'll start writing it.

Tasks

Charley Rance - Elza, New Girl
Earman, Scott - Plot
David Chapman - Chris & Soul Victims
Gavin - Dev (with input)

So start thinking of your area in this and if you have any ideas/ comments chuck them in early so I can process them and we can start getting this thing into script form asap.

Not happy with your role?

If you think you've been put in the wrong place please hip in now before we get going I don't want people not happy then pulling out. Lets get it sorted now.

Sounds good to me so far.

Sorry - am I being thick? Who's this Chris?

Actually, that's a good point. I don't recall there being a Chris before, either.

Spooky.

"You know what? Life is full of trouble and worries. Bills, relationships, taxes, women. It was really getting me down. Sometimes I couldn't sleep, sometimes I'd sleep when I wasn't supposed to. But now I don't have a care in the world. There are no worries, no problems. Not while I'm alive anyway...it's the after life I'm worried about."

Christopher Clark (Chris) is the heaven worker a bit of a twat really although he is the "Good Guy"

All sounds cool to me. Well done Gavin.

Could we have a quick round up of who each charcter is? Is Elza the boss?

lol No problem Pal

Dev - Loveable Anti-hero in the same breath as Edmond Black adder, constantly plotting to escape the retched afterlife and go back to world of the living.

Katherine - New girl who due to a mistake in the paper work has ended up here, attractive and naïve to the world of soul collecting.

Elza - Is the she bitch boss that if she let her hair down would be most do-able. Elza is trying to get Dev sent to Hell by setting him impossible tasks. Not so impossible that on the books it would look like she’s being unfair of course. Very Bureaucratic

Chris - Uptight Gimp who works for Heaven a bit of a twat really although he is the "Good Guy".

I always check the thread when I get a email notification so I've been looking at the old thread, just found this new one so I'm gonna have a read through it now

Maybe we should all give more details of our characters based around Gavins sypnosis. Here is how I see my two.

Elza. The boss of the office. A demon. Sent straight to hell for being a black widow in the 18th century. Dev and her have a love hate relationship and her main goal is to get Dev to Hell aswell as complete their task. I kind of like the fact that the Devil wants him there just as much.
In her late 30's, attractive and a first class bitch.

Catherine. Due to an error in paperwork poor old Catherine has landed herself in hot water. Last thing she remembers is a row in the car with her boyfriend. Catherine put her foot down slightly and ended up crashing into a cow. Her boyfriend ended up all deaded on top of said cow. The paperwork said murder when infact it was an accident. Maybe Dev could have placed the moo moo there as she is infact a desendent or someone he wanted on board. Maybe that could be a twist in the tale. Why does Dev want Catherine?
Catherine is very attractive, gorgeous infact. In her mid to late 20's. I would like her to have a nice side and a slightly nasty side too. You know a nice girl till you wrong her.

Let me know what you think, this is only an idea of the characters.

Sorry to clang in here, a quick comment, which you should of course ignore if it doesn't make sense to you...

Personally, I wouldn't choose jokey names for main characters, because like any joke, repeated tellings don't make you laugh - the humour wears off then starts to annoy you because you've heard it many times before. As they're main characters, you'll be mentioning their names in the dialogue and stage directions constantly - this would, I suggest, grate on readers quite quickly.

I'd give them very ordinary names, that seems funnier given their demonic job.

You're definitely right to not write a first ep, a sample ep could appear anywhere in a run, giving the reader a flavour of what a typical ep looks like. If you really want to include backstory somewhere, do it in the treatment, but only a paragraph.

Apologies if my comments are in the wrong thread!

We dont have to have the jokey names guys if you agree with Takeabow.

I don't think the names are in your face jokey, they should be okay. I think Charleys elaboration of the characters Elza and Catherine are spot on. Having a bit of a manic weekend, wife with morning sickness all day and a toddler going insane!